


Tumblr Compilation

by Monsoon



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-11-08
Updated: 2018-11-08
Packaged: 2019-08-20 16:26:53
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 20
Words: 32,199
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16559147
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Monsoon/pseuds/Monsoon
Summary: A collection of the tumblr drabbles/ficlets I've written over the years since I've never bothered to make a proper collection.





	1. Brother from Another Mother (3-Mar-2015)

**Author's Note:**

> Mind you, the quality of the earlier works is frankly shit, probably with excruciatingly gratuitous use of the word 'brat', but that's accurate history and who am I to rewrite it?
> 
> All these works are available somewhere on my tumblr but I am too lazy to link it so like. I mean. Does it even matter anyway?

Levi glowered up at the faded sign plastered above the government building entrance as if it were personally responsible for what had to be done. Kicking a scuffed sneaker against the gravel, he wondered for probably the millionth time since he’d left the house that morning if such a drastic measure was really necessary. Surely there must be another option, was it completely necessary to cut all ties? Maybe he could find a safe house? Hide Mikasa away in some small, unassuming apartment and take care of her himself in secret? It wasn’t even worth considering though; you can’t leave a five year old alone in an apartment no matter how mature they were for their age.

“Levi, I’m cold.” Levi looked down at the small girl beside him, drawn out of his sombre musings by her quiet voice. Ratty teddy bear clutched in her arms and Barney & Friends backpack secured over tiny shoulders, Mikasa blinked up at him sleepily in her favourite flowered dress. He let her dress herself that morning and even bought her a small apple pie for breakfast; anything to make their last memories together happy ones. Maybe they’d overshadow all the others that way.

Levi crouched down in front of his little sister, struggling to keep eye contact. He couldn’t bear to look at her dark, innocent eyes watching him so trustingly; not whilst knowing what he was about to do.

“Don’t worry, Mika. It will be nice and warm inside.” He rubbed his hands up and down her forearms anyway, doing what little he could. After a moment’s hesitation, he plucked off his grey beanie and eased it over her head. “There you go, that better?” He received a slight nod and dimpled smile in response. Levi’s throat clenched.

“You remember how we practised this, right?” Levi pulled the crisp white envelope from the breast pocket of his worn leather jacket and handed it to Mikasa, who received it with careful fingers. Good, she’d been listening when he stressed how important it was. “Give this letter to the nice person who will be sitting behind that counter okay? If they ask anything about mum, dad or home, say you don’t remember or don’t know. If they keep asking, cry and they’ll stop.” Mikasa nodded obediently. She was good with orders and recognizing a serious situation when presented with one; a necessary skill when your family was part of the largest criminal gangs in the city.

“Aren’t you coming in with me?” Mikasa didn’t look up at him as she turned the envelope curiously over in her small hands. That made it easier, he could never resist her puppy eyes.

“No kiddo. I can’t go in there, but you’ll be okay; you’re a big, smart girl,” he said, tried to keep the sad inflection from his voice as he pulled the beanie lower over her bangs. If he walked in that building, the social services workers would take one look at his black clothes and gang tattoos and call security. They wouldn’t dare receive Mikasa if they knew who she’d come with. If they knew of her connections.

“When will you come to pick me up?” Oh man. Levi covered his face with his hands, unable to meet his baby sister’s hopeful eyes. He felt so so tired. Maybe they could just go home, try again tomorrow? He steeled his nerves as the stray thought flitted through his mind. No, there was a reason for this; he couldn’t procrastinate any more than he already had. He was doing this for Mikasa. Someday, she would understand that too. Understand it wasn’t abandonment.

“I’m not sure.” Mikasa’s face fell and she actually looked disgruntled, looking at him as if to say  _‘what kind of answer is that?’_  Levi almost laughed. He managed a weak smile instead. “I promise I’ll come find you once I know it’s safe, okay? I promise, no matter how long it takes, I will definitely come back for you. Okay?”

“Okay.”

He patted her back and gently pushed her in the direction of the dour grey government building. “Go on,” he encouraged. Mikasa gave him a small smile and trotted off towards the huge double doors that dwarfed her in size, backpack jiggling on her back. She could be heading off for school for all appearances sake. So trusting, innocent and optimistic. As far as she was concerned she probably was, at least in that there was the same expectation that Levi would be there by the door at the end of the day like clockwork, waiting for her with bike helmet in hand as he waited with arms outstretched and smile on his face. Levi felt nauseous. She would hate him after this. The thought brought a cold spike of fear to his heart like nothing ever had before, not even with all his years as a gang member under his belt. It would help, though; it would help her move on if she had someone to heap all the blame on. That was a burden he was willing to bear.

She was pulling open the big glass door when he called after her again, his voice hoarse.

“I love you!” 

Mikasa paused to give him a funny look. Fair enough, he never normally said it often.

“I love you too, big bro!” She called back, giving him a cheerful wave before slipping into the huge building. Levi stared after her miserably, half expecting her to come sprinting back out into his arms. He knew if she did he would be completely incapable of pulling through with this again. He sort of wished she would too, which was why he turned and hurried towards his parked bike, intending to leave as soon as possible.

This was for the best. She’d thank him someday. Levi yanked on his bike and revved the engine, ignoring the sting in his eyes and his churning gut. He wouldn’t cry; this was not something to mourn, he’d just saved an innocent from a life inevitable full of death misery and danger.

He wouldn’t cry. At least not until he was too far away to contemplate turning back.

* * *

 

It would have been her 21st birthday yesterday. She would have grown into a beautiful, strong girl by now. Levi had been torn on what to buy her; he had no idea what type of person she’d become, so he settled for a bouquet of purple orchids that she’d loved when she was little. That was safe, right? Girls normally liked pricey jewellery too, but at the same time Mikasa had never struck him as the type who would.  He worried at his lower lip as he leant on the hood of his car, staring up at the plain red brick house in front of him. He must look like a date or something to a passer-byer, working up his nerves before ringing the doorbell of his lovers house.

Spurned by a sudden burst of courage, Levi stalked forward and stabbed the doorbell with his index finger before quickly back-pedalling to look up at the drawn curtains of the house for any sign of movement. It wasn’t a very nice house. Scratch that, it was awful, but then again it looked like any other typical student housing. She was probably in college, the house was walking distance from Sina University. That was good. She was doing good for herself then, with or without his help.

Movement from the balcony had him looking upward immediately. Okay, wait, where should he stand? How should he stand? Hold the flowers up? No, what the hell that was weird, he’d either look like he was offering up a sacrifice or about to serenade her. Both creepy for a first impression. He’d scrubbed up good for this; worn his best black jeans and classiest leather jacket that covered most of his tattoos. He’d even polished his shoes. Oh God.

The squeak of the aged screen door opening made his stomach drop like a stone. It was time.

“Who the fuck is it? It’s six on a Saturday, I swear to Christ if you try to sell me some bullshit about Jesus I’ll give you one Hell of a religious experience.” The figure that emerged from the house scratching a head of unruly brown bed hair and cursing like a sailor was decidedly not what Levi had been expecting.   
“Who the fuck are you?” The words were out before he could properly think it through. The boy looked in his early twenties, standing on the balcony in a pair of batman boxers and squinting at the sunrise with an expression that was the strangest combination of sleepily adorable and murderous. Boyfriend? Who else could it be? Levi felt a familiar stir of protective instincts in his belly at the thought. If he found Mikasa had ended up with some shitty, deadbeat boyfriend, there would be blood.

The young man seemed to wake up a little more at Levi’s words, leaning over the balcony balustrade to seek out the source of the unfamiliar voice that dared accost him at such an ungodly hour and on  _his_  property no less. A pair of bright green eyes glared down at Levi and, after flicking between Levi’s eyes, the flowers in his hands and back again, narrowed suspiciously.

“ _Me?_  Who the hell are  _you_?” The boy looked back at the flowers “And what the hell are  _those_? Look, if you’re here for Mika, you can fuck right off. You’re way too old for her and she’s not interested thank you goodbye.” Hearing his own nickname for Mikasa being used by some other stranger made Levi’s blood boil. Who the hell was this shithead anyway?

“I need to talk to her, is she there?” Keep it together, Levi; you’ve waited sixteen years and you can wait a little longer. You’ve dealt with more insufferable brats.

The boy paused mid turn. “I’m serious, she’s not interested. What are you, her professor? Do you want me to call the cops?”

“What are  _you_ , her handler? She’s not a fucking baby, let her speak for herself. I  _need_ to see her.”

“I’m her  _brother_ , asshole. Now you need to get the fuck off my property before I come down there and kick your wrinkly old ass.” Levi felt the air leave his lungs like he’d been kicked in the gut, the bouquet falling limply by his side.

“That’s impossible. She doesn’t – you’re not her brother.”  _He_  was her brother. Who was this guy trying to fool? How  _dare_  he.

The boy rolled his eyes, looking angered by Levi’s words. “Oh wow, good to know you haven’t gone blind with old age. Yeah, we don’t look alike, great observation. I’m her  _adopted_  brother.”

Levi stared up at the younger man in a daze. Barely registering his next words. “Now you want to give me a name that I can give the cops when I call them if you don’t leave  _right now?_ ”

“Levi.” The boy’s thick browns drew together in confusion at his mumbled response.

“What?”

“Levi. My name is Levi Ackerman.” Levi looked up and noted that the name clearly meant something to the boy, judging by his stunned look of realization and the way his green eyes widened with shock. Well, that got his attention.

“I’m Mika’s other brother”


	2. Lost My Heart in Ho Chi Minh City (18-Dec-2014)

Levi wasn’t sure where he’d gone wrong. He had known exactly where he was not ten minutes ago when he’d left the bar, even going as far as to decline several offers for a taxi ride home. He should have known better than to think he could navigate the streets of Ho Chi Minh City himself after a night of drinking with his workmates. The streets could be confusingly similar enough to an untrained eye during daytime and he’d only been here three days.

He scanned the wide road for any sign of a taxi or even someone to ask for directions but the street was completely deserted save for a pack of dogs hopefully sniffing a trash heap. He couldn’t even make out any familiar shop signs or landmarks; Vietnamese all looked the same to him. Shouldn’t the garbage men be around by now? Levi cringed at the thought of approaching a dump truck even for directions; he’d probably take stumbling around for several more hours over that. He squinted at his watch face under the light of a streetlamp. 3 AM. He had a meeting tomorrow at noon. Levi briefly pondered taking a seat by a plastic chair left outside a closed stall but quickly dismissed the idea; who knew how filthy it could be. Probably covered with street grime and dog piss.  _He_  was probably covered in street grime and dog piss.

The sound of approaching motors made him look up instantly. He was willing to offer the next motorist he saw all the cash in his wallet for a lift, and that was no meagre sum. His heart sank almost immediately when he got a good look at the approaching bikes. They numbered at about half a dozen and didn’t look like office workers returning home after a late shift either. Huge black bikes with monstrous wheels and engines that growled almost deafeningly roared down the street, commanding the entire roadway. Smoke billowed out behind them in a sinister cloud and all the riders were covered in tattoos and clad in dark clothes and leather. Today was not Levi’s day. Perhaps he could melt back into the shadows of the trees by the roadside and hope his suit helped him blend with the darkness? Maybe if he stayed really quiet too? No one had warned him about gangs in Vietnam. No one had even mentioned it was a problem and honestly, despite the hour and his intoxication, he had never for a moment felt unsafe during his whole hopeless misadventure home.

The leading motorcycle slowed to a stop just before him and the others followed suit, engines rumbling idly. Levi eyed the leader warily as the man stalled his bike and reached up with gloves hands to removes his black helmet.

“What’s a pretty face like yours doing in a place like this?” He was young. Surprisingly young. Levi had anticipated weathered features of a bikie whose face was sprawled with fading tattoos. The boy looked much younger than him with boyishly European features, tan skin, bright green eyes and a mischievous wide grin. Levi swallowed and his eyes darted between the other riders nervously but they’d made no further movements, hands glued to the bike handles and helmets in place, turned ominously in his direction.

“Just on my way home,” Levi answered with a casual shrug and made as if to continue walking away. The sound of an engine revving halted his movements and finally Levi allowed himself to feel a little panic. He had a meeting at noon. If these guys beat him up and left him for dead in some alleyway, Erwin would be furious and he’d never get that pay rise that the blond had waved temptingly before him as incentive to temporarily relocate. An extra $50k would mean nothing if he was laying dead in a dumpster. Did Vietnam even have dumpsters? Well, a trash heap was even less glorious.

“Hey now, don’t be like that. I’m not gonna hurt you,” The green-eyed brat smiled wolvishly and Levi made out the sound of some of his disciples muffled chucking behind him. At least he could speak English. At least Levi would die knowing what the other was staying. Small mercies.

“Look, kid, I don’t want any trouble. I’m just trying to get home.” Levi noted an irritated twitch of the boys lip at the word ‘kid’, but otherwise the brunet looked unfazed.

“Well, old man, you’re gonna get trouble if you keep heading that way,” the boy nodded further down the street in the direction Levi had been walking “I take it that since you’re one your way to the shadiest part of town when you’re just trying to get home, you must be lost?” Levi shot the boy a glare at the nickname but his attention was diverted by the rest of his sentence and he peered down the dark street with a frown. Well,  _that_  certainly wasn’t the way home.

“Well,” Levi cleared his throat and turned around, pretending to glance at his phone which was perfectly dead in his hands “Thanks for that. I’ll be off then.”

“Hang on, hang on.” Was he toying with him? He was toying with him, right? He’d probably tell him the other direction lead to the  _second_  shadiest part of town or something. Levi glared impatiently at the boy, daring him to try something. The brunets smile simply widened and he produced a helmet from the storage compartment of his bike, holding it out to Levi “Hop on.”

What? Levi looked between the boy and the offered helmet dubiously until the kid rolled his eyes and simply threw the helmet at Levi, whose reflexes thankfully weren’t dulled enough by the alcohol to cause him to drop it. “Look mate, I’m not leaving you out here to wander the street off your face and lost. At least let me take you back to the main road where you can call a cab.” The boy leaned forward to rest his elbows on the bike handles, dangling his hands over the end as he waited for Levi to consider his offer “You know, you really shouldn’t judge people by their appearances. I’m not a bad guy.”

“Come on, Eren, just leave him be.” One of the other riders called out. The leader, Eren, waved a dismissive hand over his shoulder and returned his attention to Levi, watching him with earnest eyes. “You hear that? This is your last chance, old man. I’m just tryin’ to do you a good turn here.”

With a resigned sigh Levi approached the two-wheeled vehicle reluctantly. He’d never ridden a bike before. The contraptions honestly gave him the heebie-jeebies; they didn’t look steady at all. Even bicycles looked flimsy enough on two wheels, but at least they travelled at manageable speeds. Motorbikes were death machines and he’d thought that before he’d moved to Vietnam and seen the way motorists manoeuvred the bikes through heavy traffic, winding and veering precariously between other vehicles and only narrowly missing collisions.

Eren seemed to sense his apprehension and shot him an encouraging smile over his shoulder “Come on, have a little faith. I didn’t become the leader of a foreign bike gang by being a shitty-ass driver.” Being reminded that he was about to hitch-hike with a gang leader did little to calm his nerves, but Levi yanked on the helmet – trying hard not to imagine how filthy it must be from all the previous use – and climbed behind the younger man before he had any more time to reconsider. The engine roared to life beneath him and suddenly they were shooting off, the others trailing obediently behind them. The roads weren’t as smooth and level here as they were back home. There would be the occasional pothole or worn gravel that would cause the bike to shudder and leap. Levi wrapped his arms around the body in front of him instinctively, his grip was probably painful. The air was cool against his body and soon, Levi had recovered enough nerves to lift his face from where it had been buried in the other man’s shoulder and appreciate the city flying past him.

Soon they were on a main road and were almost immediately enveloped by the traffic, surrounded by a swarm of other bikes and moving in their midst with the chaotic coordination of a school of fish. It never failed to amaze Levi how aware all the motorists were of each other. Although there didn’t seem to be any clear road rules – for heaven’s sake they drove on the wrong side! – there was never any danger of collision. Levi finally began paying enough attention to his surroundings to notice than no one of the other passengers of the bikes around him were holding the driver. Entire families were crammed onto one bike, but their hands hung limply by their sides or were otherwise occupied scrolling though phones. Even girls all dressed up for a night out sat side-saddle on the bikes, hands placed primly over their crossed knees. It obviously wasn’t a thing here to hold tightly to the person in front of you when riding a motorbike. Levi was suddenly ten times more aware of the heat of Eren’s back flush against his chest and even pressed against his crotch. His arms where wrapped tightly enough around the other man’s middle to feel the dip and curve of his toned abdomen through his shirt as he hunched over the bike. Immediately, Levi made to withdraw his hands. Here he was clutching to the other man like a school girl, what must he be thinking of him?

As soon as his arms began to loosen, however, Eren placed a steadying hand back over them, effectively holding them in place. He briefly glanced over his shoulder at Levi’s puzzled expression, green eyes twinkling through the bike visor as they reflected the neon lights from the street side, and gave the older man a wink before turning back to face the traffic. Levi felt his face heat up instantly, and not from the warm weather either. His heart did an uncomfortable backflip in his chest and he was almost positive that the younger man could probably feel his racing heartbeat between them. Hell, he could probably  _hear_  it.

Levi was so engrossed in trying to recover a normal heart rate that he barely noticed that they’d finally arrived on the main road that connected to the little side-street he lived on. Once they’d neared enough to his street that he could walk the remaining distance, he tapped Eren on the shoulder to alert him to pull over.

The engine stuttered to a halt as they pulled up outside a small bakery and Levi stumbled off the bike a little less gracefully than he’d have liked. He self-consciously yanked the helmet off his head and thrust it in Eren’s general direction, refusing to meet the others gaze. How dare he make a grown man blush like that? Who gave him the right?

The brunet took the helmet wordlessly and Levi could just tell that he was a confused and a little hurt by Levi’s sudden abrasiveness. How dare he not recognize that Levi was embarrassed out of his mind? How dare he make  _Levi_  feel guilty by acting all confused and hurt?

“I live down that street,” Levi said, jerking his thumb down the small street a couple meters away. He glanced up enough to see Eren follow the direction of his finger.

“Oh…err,” He looked back at Levi with a small, confused frown “I’m sorry, did you want me to give you a lift home?” Levi stared blankly at the boy before releasing an exasperated sigh.

“No, you dumbass, I’m just letting you know. For future reference,” Levi mumbled out the second half of his sentence, too embarrassed to say it any louder. He had to admit, it was cute that the boys first instinct was to offer to drive him all the way to his front door. He dug around for his wallet and held out a wad of notes. There must have been at least two million Dong just there but honestly, he would have given more if he had it. He was surprised then when the boy pushed the money away with a light laugh.

“I don’t want your money, old man. No self-respecting bloke takes cash from retirees,” He ignored Levi’s glare and forged on, dimpled smile widening as he once again lounged over his bike handles, regarding Levi coyly through his thick lashes. Levi briefly pondered if the boy knew the affect he had when he did that. Of course he knew; it was obvious just from the way his eyes gleamed coquettishly as he watched the older man.

“So what do you do for a living, old man?” He asked, eyes roaming over Levi’s crumpled suit appraisingly, and dare he think it, perhaps a little appreciatingly as well.

“Senior marketing consultant. Arrived just the other day.” Eren looked impressed, resting a cheek on his fist as he looked up at Levi.

“You have a business card?” Levi arched an eyebrow but pulled his wallet out once again, pocketing the cash and exchanging it for a white card that he held out to the curious boy.

“Why? You need my services?” He asked sarcastically. Eren just hummed as his gaze roved keenly over the card.

“Hmm, Levi Ackerman,” He read aloud before flicking the card once and slipping it in the inside pocket of his jacket “Just thought it would be a smooth way to get your number, is all.” He smiled. Levi couldn’t help the twitch of his own lips in response. This brat.

“Don’t start prank calling me in the middle of the night, okay?”

Eren gave him a sharp salute, expression one of mock seriousness “No sir! Only if I happen to be passing by and consider dropping by for a visit.”

“Don’t you dare start roaring up and down my street trying to figure out which apartment is mine either,” Levi warned, finger raised threateningly, but his tone was joking.

“You could always just tell me where you live? Or better yet, I could give you a lift there right now?” He said it teasingly, but there was enough of a hint of hopefulness to his tone for Levi to recognise there was some sincerity to his words. The older man regarded the brunet for a moment, seriously considering the invitation, before shaking his head. He was exhausted, sweaty and could feel a headache coming on already. Plus, he had a meeting at noon. If he invited the boy up tonight, there was  _no way_ he’d be able to catch enough sleep to prepare for it.

“Maybe next time, kid,” Levi said and then, seeing the way the others face fell, couldn’t help but add on “Seriously, call me.”

He turned away and left before his resolve crumbled and he committed to something he’d undoubtedly regret in a couple of hours. Levi heard the engine roar to life behind him but he didn’t turn back, raising a hand in a wave.

Levi’s phone blinked on as he plugged it in to charge and he groaned at all the missed calls and messages he’d received from Hanji and Mike, undoubtedly asking him if he’d returned home safe. One message from an unfamiliar stood out to him though, it was the most recent too, and he opened it up already knowing who’d sent it.

**_[Unknown Number]:_ ** _How abt 2nite then?_

Levi allowed himself a small smile before shooting off his reply.

**_[You]:_ ** _18/A 9.30p_


	3. The Carnival (1-Jun-2015)

The Ferris wheel loomed over the carnival grounds, techni-colour rungs lighting up the night sky like fireworks. The sounds of laughter, firecrackers and fairground music floated through the smoke-hazy air as the crowds meandered between the colourful stalls and gaudy displays.

Levi sat alone on the steps of his caravan, cutting a solitary figure as he sharpened his throwing knives and watched over the fairground from the shadows. The night had been another grand success with tickets selling out within the first hour. The Big Top had been crowded full of spectators with eyes shining with anticipation and sticky lips stretched into wide grins; all thanks to their most recently acquired act, of course. He could already hear Erwin’s voice in his head, praising the boy loudly over the dinner table in the communal tent as he offered up a toast.  

A loud cheer went up nearby and Levi’s attention was drawn in the direction of the Hall of Mirrors.  Speak of the devil.

Eren was crouched in the dusty ground in front of a little girl whose face was streaked with tears. She watched him from behind her mother, wary but curious, as he stretched his lips to show off his sharpened false teeth in a feral snarl. The little girl squealed with terrified delight, burying her face in her mothers’ skirts, but Levi could hear her giggles from here. The small crowd that had gathered to watch the charming display laughed along, patting the Lion Tamer on the shoulder and Levi watched the boy nod appreciatively at his audience, bright eyes sparkling as his face lit up with a dimpled smile.

“He puts on a good show.” Levi looked up at Hanji’s approach. They were fresh from the stage, magicians cloak swirling around their ankles and ostentatious make-up still on as they came to a stop beside him.

Levi looked back down at his work, not realising he’d been caught staring.

“He’s all right,” he muttered. Hanji cackled, dropping themselves down onto the step beside him. There really wasn’t much room for two, but they didn’t pay his protests any mind, beaming at him in that slightly manic way that forewarned trouble.

“Who are you trying to fool, Levi? You were as caught up in it as that little girl,” they nudged him in the side playfully and Levi returned the gesture with a little more force.

“ _Ow_! You know, you’re never going to charm him with that temperament and by watching him eerily from the shadow.” If Levi had been a lesser man, he might have dropped his polishing cloth at that. Instead his actions only faltered ever so slightly before he composed himself again. He didn’t answer, scowling down at the knife in his hand as he polished with renewed vigour.

“Have you even spoken to him yet?” Levi offered the faintest shake of his head. He hated the note of pity in their tone; he wasn’t pitiful, just private. “You know he was asking about you before..?”

He stopped polishing, attention caught. No, Levi did not. 

“I have an idea.” Hanji whispered eagerly right into his ear, Levi recoiled but they didn’t pay his disgusted expression any mind. Instead, they turned to face Eren again, straightening up slightly.  _Oh no_.

“Hanji, don’t you d—“

“EREN!” The magician bellowed, stage voice easily carrying over the hubbub of the carnival noise. Eren looked up and Levi instinctively duked his head, hiding behind Hanji’s frame.

“Hanji, what the  _fuck_?!” he hissed.

“Hey, come over here for a sec,” Hanji beckoned with a wide smile. “You wanted to meet our resident Dare Devil, didn’t you?” Did he? Levi peeked out over Hanji’s shoulder and immediately retracted his head when he saw that the boy was heading over. He was coming over. To talk to  _him_. Hanji giggled, grinning down at him triumphantly.

Levi cleared his throat and straightened up, putting his game face on. His heart was hammering against his ribcage, but it wouldn’t do to show how nervous he felt. He had a reputation.

Eren was standing a few feet away, hands clasped behind his back as he shuffled restlessly from foot to foot and glanced between Hanji and Levi nervously. Levi could see the way his eyes kept straying in his direction, clearly fighting the urge to stare. People were like that when they first saw him, both circus folk and regular people. He was an oddity after all, dressed in black with a scowl that could rival Medusa’s glare in venom. Eren probably just saw him as another curiousity.

“Um…” The boy smiled nervously, looking desperately to Hanji. Levi saw his Adams apple bob as he swallowed. Here he was a boy that played with grown lions daily dancing around Levi like  _he_  was the four hundred pound carnivore.

“Eren, you were asking about little Levi here yesterday, weren’t you?” Hanji said, thumping Levi on his back fondly. The boys green eyes widened in alarm and he furiously shook his head, looking like he’d just been accused of snooping around Levi’s caravan or worse.

“I – no, I wasn’t trying to  _pry_. I was just, um, sorry I was a little curious? I mean, no one talked about you much or introduced you and I was just, you know…?” Eren shrugged and left the sentence hanging, looking down at his feet like he wished the ground would open up and swallow him. Levi felt his chest ache. Just how terrified was this boy of him? Not that he usually cared about people giving him his space regardless of their reasons.

“No no, don’t worry Eren! Levi is a sweetie if you get to know him; don’t you believe those rumours you hear.” Hanji paused in thought. “Well,  _most_  of them. Anyway you two get chatting, I have to go conjure some bouquets.” Hanji wriggled their fingers theatrically between Levi and Eren like they did when they were on stage before turning to leave with an extravagant swish of their cloak. Don’t you  _dare_  leave you son of a—.

Levi gritted his teeth at Hanji’s retreating back. Reluctantly, he turned back to face the boy in front of him. Eren was peeking up at him through his lashes. He looked just about as nervous as Levi felt and Levi had trouble keeping his eyes on him. He’d been so used to quickly looking away whenever those eyes turned to him, careful to not be caught staring, that it felt strange now that he was  _allowed_  to look.

“I don’t want to bother you, sir. I was just curious. I’ll leave you alone now…” No no, don’t go! Levi opened his mouth, hating his inability to never know what to say.

“What are you curious about?” He forced his eyes down, too nervous to see the reaction to his words. He scrubbed the gleaming blade with a vengeance. Eren didn’t speak for a moment, but Levi could see he wasn’t trying to leave anymore at least. He could feel those green eyes on his hands, watching carefully, and he willed the boy to speak. He didn’t usually mind silence, but this one was nerve-wracking.

“…Which rumours are real?” The question was tentative, afraid of overstepping a line. Levi paused and looked up at the boy with an arched brow.

“Any rumours in particular? There are a lot, you know.” Eren grinned and Levi felt like he’d passed a huge hurdle. He didn’t look nervous anymore, his eyes were eager and excited.

“All of them!” Eren took a hesitant step forward, eyes darting to the small empty space on the step beside Levi. “Do you mind if I sit down…?”

Levi looked down at the space beside him that could not possible fit two grown men without some degree of awkward intimacy. It was a tight fit and Levi did not usually like people in his space. His heart raced madly in his chest and he cleared his throat before replying.

“Not at all.”


	4. Mikasa's Hot Brother AU I guess (6-May-2015)

Eren had been living in his apartment complex for almost three years now. He loved the place; the neighbours all formed a close-knit community and they were so comfortable with each other that almost everyone had a spare key to at least one other person’s place. Usually, this was for the obvious reasons like in case of emergencies or so someone could pop by and water plants while someone was away. Eren, however, lived with his childhood friend Armin right next door to Mikasa (who they’d met in college and grown fast friends with), so they had a habit of using each other’s spare keys to randomly drop by whenever they were bored.

Today in particular was proving to be an especially dull day. Armin was camped out at the Uni library studying for his midsems so Eren was left to his own devices. After half an hour of flicking through TV channels hoping for something to catch his eye (it was 7pm on a weeknight though, so the only things on were shitty reality shows and the news), he finally gave up and snatched up the spare key to Mikasa’s place. If nothing else, he could always rely on Mikasa to provide good company.

Eren barged into the neighbouring apartment without so much as a knock to herald his arrival, kicking off his shoes at the door and tossing his jacket onto a coat hook. The place was like a second home to him; there was no need for formalities here.

“Yo, ‘Kasa! You home?” The kitchen light wasn’t on; that was unusual. It wouldn’t be strange if Mikasa wasn’t in, but he could hear the shower running so clearly  _someone_ was. Annie had flown out of the city two nights ago to visit her mum too, so that only left Mikasa.

Eren plonked himself down on one of the stools lining along the kitchen bench, resigning himself to wait a little longer, when something out of the ordinary caught his eye. Sitting by the telephone was an unfamiliar set of keys and a wallet.

A  _mans_  wallet.

Eren instantly knew something was amiss. Wait – the shower was no longer running! Eren barely had time to scramble out of the stool when he heard the bathroom door open.

He was standing by the kitchen when the stranger walked out, clad in nothing but a towel tied around his waist, hair still dripping shower water.

“Mikasa, where did you say the spare clothes were…?” The stranger paused as he caught sight of Eren, his sentence petering off to nothing. Eren’s gaze flicked along the man’s frame. He was pretty short, but well built. His entire frame looked to be packed with muscle, the residual water rolling down alabaster skin and washboard abs. Eren’s inspection lead him up to a pair of light grey eyes that were scrutinizing him in turn, narrowed with suspicion.

“You’re not Mikasa,” hot stranger said. It was not a question, but Eren found himself compelled to shake his head anyway.

“Neither are you,” he said, as if he needed to clarify. Grey eyes narrowed almost imperceptibly. Eren took that as a confirmation.

The stare-down continued, Eren wasn’t sure for how long. He could feel an anxious sweat break out on his forehead under Hot Stranger’s sharp gaze. He felt like a cornered animal, afraid to move or speak. If it came down to a fight, Eren didn’t think he could take him; those muscles looked like they were more than just for show. In saying that, Eren  _did_  have the advantage of being fully clothed. He was mid-way through choreographing an elaborate fight scene in his head in which he’d snatch the towel off from around Hot Strangers waist and then wave it like he was  _banderillero_  in a bull fight when he heard the sound of a key turning in the front door.

“Levi? Are you done? Sorry, I just went down to the store to grab some stuff for dinner. I thought maybe we could—” Mikasa blinked as she came through the front door and walked straight into the awkward stand-off.

Eren rounded on her immediately, still keeping a wary eye on the Hot Stranger in case he made any sudden movements.

“Mikasa what the hell? I thought you were gay!” he hissed. Mikasa’s eye’s widened in surprise, but Eren forged on before she could plead her case. If his friend was cheating on her long-term partner, there had to be a proper explanation. That wasn’t even the bit that got to him. “Could you at least give your single gay neighbour a heads up next time you smuggle hot shit into your apartment? I can only take so much. I almost had a heart attack when he walked out of the bathroom like something straight out of a wet dream. I thought I was hallucinating after months of pent-up sexual frustration!” Hot Stranger blinked and actually looked surprised, apparently he  _was_  capable of emotions. Wait, was he  _smirking_?

“Oh my God, Eren. Calm down.” Mikasa shoved past him to dump the bag of groceries on the kitchen bench. “Jesus Christ, I can’t believe you,” she began, massaging her temple as she turned to face him. “Levi, this is my neighbour Eren. Gay, single, and sexually-frustrated, but you already know that. Eren,” Eren felt his cheeks grow hot. Mikasa was looking at him in that exasperated way that forewarned him that he had just made a complete fool of himself and he was shortly going to find out exactly why. “This is Levi. He is my  _brother_.”

_Oh_.

Hot Stranger – Levi – stepped forward and extended a hand. He was still rather naked, and Eren felt his blush spread to his ears and down his neck as he reached out to shake the offered hand. Levi was definitely smirking now, his keen eyes watching Eren’s face intently like he was finding every agonizingly embarrassing second of the encounter extremely entertaining.

“Hello Eren. Nice to finally meet you, I’ve heard so much.” Eren let out a feeble squeak and Levi’s eyes sparkled with mirth. “Also gay, single, and sexually frustrated, although…” Grey eyes scanned the length of Eren’s frame, undressing him with his eyes until Eren felt like  _he_  was the one who was standing in the kitchen naked. “…I feel like I won’t be for long.” The roguish smile and smouldering wink aimed his way made Eren feel like his whole body was aflame. His gay little heart fluttered weakly in his chest.

“Oh my God, could you  _please_  tone it down and put on some clothes? I left them on the washing machine.” Mikasa complained loudly, interrupting the moment. Eren cleared his throat loudly, breaking the dizzying eye contact and looking away. He fought the urge to place a hand over his chest and feel for his heartbeat. Levi laughed softly as he made his way to the laundry.

“I’m here for the week, Eren. I guess I’ll see you around. Doors always unlocked.”

“I have a key.” He wasn’t sure why he said it. Why he felt the need to say  _anything_ , really.

“I know. I meant the  _bathroom_ door.” Eren didn’t need to turn around to know Levi was smiling as he said the words.

Oh, his poor gay heart.


	5. Rosemary With Love (And Protection) (26-Jul-2015)

Levi let the aged wooden door fall shut behind him with a weak groan and fought his way through the small forest of scratchy green foliage crowded around the entryway. Every week he’d walk into this disaster of a shop and remember the multitude of things he meant to complain to Hanji about, only to forget it all once he got to the counter.

“I’ll be out in just a minute, Levi. I’m just finishing up your ointment now.” Eren’s voice drifted out from somewhere up the back of the store, hidden behind the rows of acacia shelves over flowing with ancient jars and clay pots. He took in a deep breath of the woody scent of spices and dried herbs, waiting for his eyesight to adjust to the dim lighting of the interior. It was an ancient relic of a store, probably heritage listed right next to the town’s two century old post office. The inside was completely wooden; exposed rafters and uneven hardwood floors warped with centuries of heavy traffic. Dust motes wafted like snowflakes, glowing in the hazy rays of sun filtering through the dirty skylights. Spider webs sparkled in the corners of the roof, drifting like transparent sails, always perfectly maintained. Hanji liked the spider webs and always waved off his complaints, saying they took care of the blue bottles and gave their store ‘character’ like some side show at a fairground. The classic ‘Witch’s Hut’ look. He gave up arguing after a few weeks; he learned there wasn’t much point.

Levi shed his heavy woolen coat, carefully hanging it up on the hat stand by the door between bulbs of dirt-covered roots and peculiar handmade charms. He began his journey winding between the labyrinthine turns of the shelving and trunks littered around the floor in some strange arrangement of organized chaos that no one except Hanji and Eren seemed to be able to navigate. His cane tapped loudly against the floor, the floorboards protesting under his limp as he made his way in the direction of Eren’s voice. His joints were extra sore today.

“How are you feeling today, Captain? Any problem areas?” Eren’s sunshine voice always made him feel more relaxed. Perhaps it was his conscience knowing that the pain would go away soon after he heard it, or maybe something more, but it always lifted his mood.

“I told you not to call me that. I’m not a Captain anymore.” Eren laughed. The sound like music, drifting between the shelves, louder as he drew closer. Didn’t matter how many times Levi said it, the next time he walked through those doors, he’d be greeted as ‘Captain’ again like clockwork. His protests were more out of habit now than with any real feeling. “My shoulder’s been stiff ever since I got up this morning. Legs the same as always.” The ghost of old war wounds still came to haunt him every now and then, aching like the shrapnel was still lodged deep in his bones. Eren hummed in understanding.

“I thought so. I added some succulents for that. Lavender too.”

“Lavender?” That was a new one. He rounded the final shelf and the store counter final came into view. An old antique register sat proudly atop the distressed wooden counter, varnish dark and scratched with age. Plants were crowded along the floor and along the counter top, vines creeping up the peeling paint walls and framing the small ‘employee only’ section in leafy greenery. A thick brown curtain sealed off the back rooms from prying eyes. That’s where all the magic happened, and even now as Levi settled his weight against the desktop, groaning as he took the load off his feet, he could the Eren’s silhouette dancing behind the screen.

“Yes, lavender. For calming. You haven’t been sleeping very well either, have you?” Levi pursed his lips and sighed. He supposed it was good Eren always seemed to know what was ailing him because if it was up to him to disclose everything himself, he’d always forget. He could hear clay jars clinking and the sound of a mortar and pestle grinding away as Eren worked diligently. “I’ll make you a sleeping charm too, if you like. On the house for my favourite customer.” He could hear the smile in the apprentice’s voice, and it made his own lips quirk up ever so slightly at the corners. That shouldn’t make Levi feel as happy as it did. The boy probably used that line with every regular, but it still made him smile like the silly old man he was.

“Thank you, Eren.” Eren hummed again, this time a wordless ‘ _of course’_ , and they settled down into comfortable silence, punctuated only by the ticks of the grandfather clock echoing in the hallway and the groan of the old house shifting and settling around them. Eren began to whistle to himself and Levi knew he’d be finished soon. He hooked his cane on the edge of the counter and leaned on his elbows, watching the younger man’s faint silhouette bustle around the back room.

He was jostled out of his daydreams when Eren swept back the curtain, brandishing a brown paper bag like a trophy and smiling brightly. His bright eyes were always laughing, like he’d just gotten a joke someone told him earlier. Levi smiled at the sight.

“Hello,” Eren laughed, placing the package before him before starting to ring up the purchase. “I missed you last week. I don’t know if you noticed.” Levi’s heart skipped a beat and he struggled to keep his expression neutral, rifling through the contents of the bag so he didn’t end up staring at the other or something by accident.  _Of course I noticed._  He’d wanted to ask, but he was never good at this sort of thing and didn’t want to come off as creepy. Eren didn’t seem to notice his internal crisis, though, chatting away brightly. “My sister is in town. I went to the beach with her and my best friend.”

“Armin?” Levi knew all about Eren’s friends now from all his idle chat during his past appointments. He retained all the information too, carefully filing it away in a small space reserved just for Eren.

“Yes! You remember!”  _Of course I do._  Eren grinned at him widely. He had a chipper tooth on the bottom row. Levi was yet to hear that story. He could see Eren was slightly darker than the usual sun-kissed tan, freckles dusting the bridge of his nose. He had to look away, pretending to be engrossed in his purchases. 

There was the usual small jar of green oil that he used for his aching joints and sore muscles, but Eren had added a small drawstring pouch that smelt of lavender and other unfamiliar herbs, presumably to place under his pillow to help him sleep. He also found another small brown sachet about the size of the palm of his hand tucked away in there too, and he frowned as he pulled it out and looked at Eren inquiringly. It was labelled ‘Rosemary & Hibiscus’ in Eren’s familiar spidery black scrawl.

“What’s this? Is this meant to be here?” Eren glanced at the packet briefly before returning to scowling at the register in concentration. He was too focused on the buttons and dials, though, and Levi also noticed the slightest dusting of pink over his cheeks.

“Eren?” He prompted when the boy made no indication to explain. Oh yes, he was definitely blushing now.

“Just… just a little herb mix.” He was trying very hard not to look his way when he spoke, and it made Levi all the more intrigued. He leaned in closer over the counter, watching the other closely.

“…What for?” Eren’s Adam’s apple bobbed as he swallowed, eyes darting nervously everywhere but in Levi’s direction.

“It will make you feel better, I think.” He finally risked a look his way, a tentative peek through long lashes.  Levi nodded and smiled, turning the parcel over in his hand thoughtfully.

“Okay, I trust you.” He heard Eren release a relieved little sigh at that and he waited quietly for him to finish. Eren was still new to this, he was probably still getting a hang of the ropes and herbology. But if he thought this would help, then Levi would give it a go.

“Let me know how you feel, okay?” Eren took Levi’s payment and wrote him up a receipt. Levi hummed. It gave him another excuse to drop by this week, so why not?

* * *

Levi took a deep breath before throwing his weight against the flaking front door, wincing as it groaned.

“Hanji, I swear to God if you don’t get this door fixed soon I’ll smash a hole through one of the panes,” He announced, hanging up his coat and hat.

“Levi, old friend! What a pleasant surprise!” Levi grumbled under his breath as he began hobbling through the cluttered interior of the store. “Why are you in today? Didn’t you get your ointment from Eren already?”

“Yes, but he gave me something else to try too and told me to let him know how it works.” The counter came into view and Hanji popped out from behind the brown curtain, a puzzled frown on their face and safety goggles on. There was something slimy and blue in their hair. Levi guessed they were concocting again.

“Hm? He didn’t mention anything about that to me.” Hanji tapped their chin and frowned as they tried to recall. “Well he’s not in today, but if there’s anything you’re worried about, I can help you out.” Levi felt himself deflate at that. Eren wasn’t in?

Hanji pulled out a dusty old tome and began to flip through the yellowed pages. “I don’t usually like it when the novices deviate from anything I prescribe. Do you remember what he gave you by any chance?”

Levi pulled out the empty, crumpled sachet from his trouser pocket and slid it over the counter. “It wasn’t bad. Actually, I think I’ve been feeling a lot better since he gave it to me; I just wanted to let him know.” Hanji snatched up the packet and squinted at the writing while Levi watched their expression carefully. He was slightly worried now, he hoped Eren hadn’t accidentally poisoned him.

“Rosemary… Hibiscus… Hmm.” Hanji sniffed the inside and something seemed to hit them. “Oh!” Their expression morphed into a sly smile. “ _Oh._ ”

“What?”

“Oh ho  _ho_.” Levi sighed in exasperation as the witch snickered, waggling their eyebrows at him.

“Hanji. What is it?”

“These aren’t for  _bodily_  aches, my friend.” Hanji waved the sachet in his face before rounding the rickety counter. “These are for the ailments of the  _heart_.” Levi frowned and placed a hand over his chest.

“I don’t have any heart conditions.”  _Or did he?_ Eren always knew what was wrong with him without him needing to say anything. Hang on, did Eren detect something wrong with his heart?!

Hanji seemed to sense his rising panic and patted his arm reassuringly. “Goodness, you’re as thick as a mandrake milkshake, dear.” Levi opened and closed his mouth wordlessly as Hanji pulled their book across the counter and began flipping through the pages once more.

“Rosemary: for love and protection,” They read out, tapping at each word as they went. “Hibiscus: love, coltsfoot: prosperity and love, clove: friendship and love, Ginseng, vervain, raspberry leaf, love, love,  _love_.” They slammed the book shut and pointedly looked at him over their goggles. Levi stared back dumbly. Did that mean…? No, it couldn’t. Except Hanji was nodding at him like they knew exactly what was crossing his mind.

“I don’t… What should I do?” His heart was slamming against his rib cage and his fingers tightened around his cane. Eren? Like  _him?_  

“What do you  _want_ to do?” They asked softly. Was there even a question of what he wanted to do? The bright, beautiful boy who greeted him warmly enough to drive the winter chill from his bones was propositioning  _him_. What plagued him was why? He was just a weary, broken veteran who lived alone on the bluffs outside town. He’d thought he was so pitiful looking forward to his weekly trips to pick up his medicine, if only to see the young apprentice for a few minutes. He’d never thought it would come to this. 

“…Say yes?” He said it so softly he was worried they didn’t hear. But Hanji already knew anyway. He bet they’d known since he’d first walked through the front door and been introduced to the new apprentice. “I’m no good at this sort of thing, Hanji.” His voice was quiet and hushed. He was nervous, absentmindedly scratching the peeling varnish under his nails.

“Eren does like his riddles.” Hanji pursed their lips thoughtfully, staring at a flickering candle sitting in a mason jar dangling over their heads. Levi laughed ruefully and scratched at his undercut.  _Of all things…_

“I’m really no good with words.”

“That’s alright, dear. Riddles don’t need words; sometimes words only make things more complicated.” They sighed and perched their chin in their hand, watching him warmly. “Bring him some Ambrosia; he’ll know what that means.”

“Ambrosia? Do you have that here?” He’d never herd of that ingredient before. Hanji laughed.

“I’m a witch, not a florist. Go ask Petra down the road; if you mention they’re for Eren, I bet she’ll give you a discount,” Hanji said with a wink. Levi looked down at his hands. Ambrosia, huh?

“…When will—?”

“He’s opening up tomorrow morning if you wanna catch him when I’m not around.”

“You’ll be there now too, won’t you?” Hanji snickered ominously and rounded back around the counter without answering. Levi shook his head and smiled.

“Thanks, Hanji.”

“Get it, old boy.” Petra closed at half past four; if he hurried, he just might make it in time to check if she could prepare a bouquet for him to pick up tomorrow. Levi tugged on his coat and wrestled open the door.

“No meddling tomorrow, Hanji!” He called over his shoulder.

“I’m a witch, Levi. Meddling is what I do!”

 

~~

(P.S. Ambrosia = ‘Your love is reciprocated’)


	6. Masquerade (14-Jun-2015)

These things had lost their allure over time. He used to be struck dumb by the grandeur of it all; magnificent crystal chandeliers hanging from the high domed ceilings, champagne fountains bubbling quietly by the staircase, and gargantuan ice sculptures towering over the floor, sparkling under the million lights. He used to watch quietly from the sidelines as a displaced spectator, enthralled by the ladies multi-coloured gowns swirling around the dance floor to the powerful chords of the live orchestra. He used to feel so small and out-of-place in his fancy, tailored suit with a flute of pricey champagne he didn’t have the palette to savour. Those days were long gone, though. Now, he saw these balls for what they really were; stifling opportunities for the wealthy to show off how much money they could afford to splash around. Drawn out, dull and tedious. He didn’t bother with courteous pretences anymore, didn’t bother to politely entertain the mindless conversations of the cashed up nobles who could only talk at length about the décor, food, or politics they only understood superficially. What was the point? If they were offended by his scathing, caustic commentary, then they gave him a wide berth and frankly, that was all he wanted. He was only here because of Erwin. Because he owed it to the older man so the least he could to was accompany him to these drab galas so the aspiring politician could show him off like some circus freak to the sheltered Lords and Ladies. The closest they’d ever probably come to someone from the underground.

Levi brought his half-finished glass back to his lips. At least the food was good, if not the company. He could see Erwin a little ways off laughing with a group of silver-haired old men. ‘Networking’ he called it. Levi didn’t understand diplomacy. He made contacts through negotiation or death threats, and that had served him well enough over the years. He supposed these people would call that uncivil, though, as if they were the reigning authority on polite society. Whatever; at the end of the day, he got paid to clean up their dirty work via his ‘uncivil’ means.

His eyes were drawn in the direction of the entrance as another guest entered. A couple. It was the woman that caught his eye at first, a stunning Asian girl with dark, watchful eyes and a lean framed sheathed in a deep red velvet gown that dragged behind her in a crimson train. She was striking and regal, head held aloft as she strode into the room, ignoring the awestruck men and women scrambling to catch her eye. She didn’t look familiar, and Levi wasn’t sure if it was simply the way she carried herself or if she was indeed someone important that had the nobles vying for her attention. His eye drifted to her companion who stood out for a completely different reason. He looked far too young to be attending an event like this usually reserved for stuffy, middle-aged entrepreneurs and politicians. He had boyish good looks and sharp, breath-taking green eyes that danced around the room with a mixture of childish awe and barely concealed disdain. There was something different about him. He was not from this world; that much was obvious from a glance. He was far too captivated by the glamour of his surroundings, and the tell-tale contemptuous curl to his lip gave away his derision. He was not used to such company, and he’d yet to learn to mask his judgement behind false smiles and civil banter. Levi recognized the tells of an imposter; he’d mastered all the basics himself, after all.

Levi followed the duo with his eyes the entire night, although admittedly his gaze was trained more on the boy. The girls face was a mask of distant apathy and gave nothing away, and her place at the gala he still was not sure of. While he’d been attending these events for years and never seen her before, the confident air that she carried herself with was convincing enough the he could believe she was no stranger to high society. The boy was another story. He struggled to keep up the façade, but only a practised eye could notice it. A practised, vigilant eye. Levi caught him slouch every now and again when he thought nobody was watching, rolling his shoulders to work out the kinks of holding such a rigid posture that should be second nature to anyone in this room. He saw the way he eyed the buffet; through wondrous eyes that knew starvation, and the way those same eyes always hovered keenly over the jewels at ladies throats before drifting to their eyes with a put-on smile that dripped with chivalry. Oh, Levi knew all the tricks, which is why when the boy bowed to press a kiss to one of the tittering ladies gloved hands, he noticed instantly the way he expertly slid off one of her rings without her noticing.

“I knew there was a reason you’d been watching him all night.” Levi barely glanced up as Erwin appeared by his side, his gaze also fixed on the duo across the ballroom.

“You saw that too?” Erwin nodded, his blue eyes keen and calculating. Levi wasn’t sure what he was thinking, but he knew he wasn’t the type to draw attention to it. He wanted to see how this played out, first.

“Do you recognise them?” He asked, looking up at the taller man. Erwin was acquainted with basically everyone in the large hall. He could clear up once and for all the mystery of the unfamiliar pair, but he shook his head.

“No, never seen either of them. I asked a few people, but they admitted they weren’t sure either. No one here isn’t going to ask many questions; they don’t want to appear unconnected and out of the loop. They’re all playing along, but I can guarantee they’re as clueless as we are.”

“You think they’re imposters.” Levi didn’t pose it as a question. Erwin looked down at him from the corner of his eye.

“I know you do, and I trust your judgement.” Levi hummed.  _Interesting_.

He was still watching the boy finish his conversation with the young lady and her friends and turn to leave when his eyes caught Levi’s from across the dance floor. For a moment, he smiled politely and it didn’t seem to register, but Levi saw the exact moment it hit the boy that Levi had seen everything. He saw the way his smile froze on his face, those stunning green eyes widening fractionally, fearfully, staring at Levi like a frightened deer caught in the crosshairs of a hunters rifle. The corners of Levi’s lips tugged up in a smirk.  _Gotcha_.

“I’ll be right back.” Levi pushed his finished drink into Erwin’s hand and started to make his way across the room, his gaze not once leaving the other boys. Green eyes tracked him carefully, watchfully. More like a wary jungle cat than a deer, now. He wasn’t poised to run, Levi could see that in the defensive curl of the boys shoulders tensed up under the sharp cut of his suit. He was poised to fight back, gaze skittering over Levi’s form as he approached, reading and assessing him. Levi recognized the gait of a street fighter. This boy belonged in this room just about as much as Levi did.

Levi came to a halt a good distance from the other, too far apart for the intimacy of a ballroom conversation. Street etiquette; out of arms reach and adequate room to dodge a surprise attack _. I come in peace, for now_. The brunet notes this, eyes narrowing fractionally as he takes in Levi’s relaxed stance. Those eyes are beautiful, like the emeralds that dangle from women’s ears. His skin is a healthy, sun-kissed brown. Already, that sets him apart from the others. Only poor people are out under the hot sun long enough to go so dark, but Levi thinks the contrast between his eyes and skin is breathtakingly startling. Dark brown hair, tousled and soft and painstakingly sculpted to resemble some degree of grooming. It’s not supposed to be brushed back like that, held tame with wax and sheer willpower. A strand has come loose, dangling rogue over the boy’s forehead. When he smiles, Levi notes his prominent canines. It makes him look wolfish, and he imagines those sharp teeth sinking into the juncture between neck and collar bone. Levi shivers. He wonders how long the boy would allow himself to be teased and played before he bit back. He doesn’t look like it would take much; he’s a wild animal wrestled into a mansuit for a night. Levi wants to peel it off, layer by layer.

Levi let’s his gaze rove shamelessly over the boy, taking him in, taking him apart. It should be rude, but he was in the advantaged position here and that was his entitlement. The boy knows this and stays quiet, lets him do his thing while looking him over just as intently.

“Good evening.” Levi smiles, bows his head ever so slightly. Politely. He’s going to keep up this act, he decides; this is the most interesting thing to ever happen at one of his events. He wants to see how this plays out, too. “I don’t believe we’ve met. My name is Levi Ackerman.”

The boy inclines his head, eyes darting between Levi’s cautiously, and then he returns the smile, if that’s what you want to call it. Lips pulled back, teeth bared, feral. Levi’s eyes flicker to those canines and he repressed the urge to bite his lip.

“Eren.” That is all he offers. No matter, Levi only needs one name. He watches him, waiting to see his next move. Thick brows pull together in confusion when Levi bows again and holds out a hand, never breaking their gaze to watch him through his lashes. Levi decides then and there he doesn’t want to let this boy out of his sight.

“May I have this dance?”

 


	7. Pal Rakkinne (14-Jul-2015)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Platonic Ereri

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **GLOSSARY:**
> 
>  
> 
>  _Pal Rakkinne_ \- translates as ‘plantation watching’ (?) and refers to when farmers go out to keep watch over their crops, staying in little tree-house/platform things so they can scare away any elephants or wild animals that might come onto their land and trample the plants
> 
>  _Amma_ \- mother
> 
>  _Thatha_ \- father
> 
>  _Biryani_ \- south asian curried fried rice dish.
> 
>  _Bana_ \- Buddhist teachings and sermons

_Thwack! Thwack! Thwack!_

Eren’s oversized sandals slapped loudly against the winding dirt path, kicking up sand that sprayed against the back of his legs and clung to the thin cotton of his shorts. The full moon hung heavy in the sky overhead, the only source of light on the beaten track. They’d just got back from the temple when his mother had sent him off with some leftovers from the  _Dana_  wrapped in a banana leaf to keep it fresh.

_Thwack! Huff! Thwack!_

The night was alive with the chirp and drone of insects hidden away in the greenery bordering each side of the path. There was barely a breeze to rustle the leaves tonight. The tall, eerie silhouette of the scraggly trees stood still and unmoving, arching up over him like giant clawed hands waiting to cage him in. He clung fiercely to the precious parcel hugged against his chest.

The paddy fields one either side of him looked like a carpet of soft grass under the purple moonlight. Completely still and peaceful, the ghostly glow of fireflies dancing in the distance. If he didn’t know better, he’d be tempted to take cut across the fields on a shortcut. Last time he’d done that he’d walked home dripping wet up past his knees and his amma had scolded him loudly as she’d painstakingly plucked the leeches from his calves. He wouldn’t be trying that again.

_Thwack! Huff! Thwack!_

He was getting tired, but he could make out the lanterns through the tree leaves. Not much farther now. He could hear the muffled echo of a  _baila_  song from the next post across the field. A catchy beat set by banging a wooden spoon against a clay pot accompanied the jovial singing. Over on the other side, he could hear the faint notes of a flute drifting through the trees.  _Pal rakkinne_  could get boring. People had to make their own fun while stuck up in the trees alone until daybreak with only a few tools at their disposal.

Eren slipped off the path when he came to his thatha’s  field and picked his way carefully through the waist high weeds, parcel tucked under one arm as he used a long stick he’d found to poke around in the dark in front of him. He didn’t want to step on a snake out here alone. His sandals stuck in the soft clay of the ground, each step making a loud  _schlop!_  as he pulled it free of the sticky mud. He could see the tree house up ahead now. Well, it was really just a few planks of wood forming platform across the branches. Just enough room for one man and supplies to last a night’s shift.

An old oil lantern hung from one of the branches, a small cloud of insects hovering around it attracted to its warm orange glow. Eren put one foot up on the rickety ladder that lead up to the platform, bouncing it experimentally as he peered up to where he had to climb. He couldn’t hear anything, unlike the music and singing from the other posts, but he knew Levi always preferred to read or do some other quiet work to keep himself preoccupied in the long, drawn-out hours of a watch.

“Levi?” It wasn’t necessary to keep quiet, in fact, it was probably better to be the complete opposite given the point of the watch, but Eren always felt compelled to whisper when he came out into the fields at night. He heard the sound of movement from above and the creak of aged wood before Levi’s head appeared over the ladder.

“Hey kid, back from the temple?” Eren nodded and held up the leaf-wrapped parcel for Levi to see.

“Amma got you lump rice. She said you might be hungry.” The older man smiled, his dark hair falling loosely around his face.

“Well, come on up. Do you need a hand?” Eren shook his head. If the older boys could climb up these ladders alone with clay pots and lanterns hanging off themselves, he could do it with a tiny package. He tucked his baggy singlet into the elastic of his oversized shorts before stuffing the parcel into his shirt. He ignored the sound of Levi’s muffled laughter overhead and, face set in a determined frown, began his ascent.

Levi helped him with the last few rungs, pulling him up from under his arms before setting him down beside himself. Eren retrieved the food parcel and handed it over before shimmying into the corner of the platform, drawing his knees up to his chin as he settled down to wait. He watched Levi pluck at the yarn tying the parcel together, working the knot with deft fingers and unwrapping the large leaves. There wasn’t much room up here. It wasn’t meant to be comfortable; the point was to stay awake and watch over the fields, if it was comfortable and roomy, people drifted off and risked not being awake to scare away wild boars or elephants that might roam into their land and spoil the crops.

Eren’s eyes lingered on the food. He’d already eaten dinner, but it looked so good. Temple food was always delicious; every housewife brought their personal special to show off their culinary skills to the public. Fresh biryani, chilli sambol, fried onion and a hard-boiled egg. It was the only reason he could endure the drawn out  _Bana_  and sitting cross-legged on a hardwood floor for so long; looking forward to the feast at the end.

“Have you eaten?” Levi must have noticed him staring longingly at his food. Eren nodded and looked down at the flaking dried scabs on his knees, ashamed to be caught staring. “Here.” He looked up to Levi offering him a mouthful of rice in his outstretched hand. Eren was too old to be hand fed now. He’d told his amma so and she’d laughed before obliging to his demand to have his own big-boy plate. He looked from the offered food up at Levi. He wasn’t laughing at him. Levi was the only man in the village who didn’t laugh at him when he said he was old enough to join the dads when they went out to do the night watch. Levi said if his amma let him, he could join him during his shift one night if he liked. Eren liked Levi.

He leant forward and opened his mouth wide enough to receive the mouthful. He helped Levi finish the rest of the food parcel, accepting every second mouthful after Levi. He watched the older man lean over the platform edge to wash his hands with water from a clay pot, the timber groaning under his shifting weight. He shook the residual water droplets off his fingertips, drying them on a handkerchief he then slung over his shoulder. He leaned against the tree bough on the other side of the platform, arms draped over his knees as he settled down to wait.

“You staying here with me tonight, are you?” Levi didn’t smile with his mouth often and the other village kids thought that meant he was mean. They said his eyes were cold and he glared a lot, but Eren knew Levi preferred to smile with his eyes. He only glared at boys like Jean who threw stones at the buffalo as they grazed. Levi smiled at Eren a lot. While it annoyed him when the other kids said mean things about Levi, it sort of made him happy to think only he knew this side of the man.

“Amma said I could if you let me.”

“If she says so.” Eren smiled, his teeth chattering. It was quite cold out here at night despite the blistering humidity in the day time. He was only wearing a thing singlet and shorts as well.

“You cold?” Levi was also only wearing a singlet and long pants, but  _he_  wasn’t shivering. Eren shook his head. He didn’t want to be sent home now. Levi eyed him sceptically in the dim glow of the lantern, his critical gaze carefully noting the gooseflesh along Eren’s arms. Eren hid them behind his knees self-consciously. He could handle a little cold if Levi could.

“Well I am,” Levi finally said, looking away from Eren and making a show of shivering. He rubbed at his arms as if trying to warm himself up. It was a silly little act that wouldn’t fool anyone, but it served its purpose in reassuring Eren that he wouldn’t be sent home at least.

“Here.” Eren crawled the short distance between them on hands and knees before turning around so he could curl up against his chest. “I’ll keep you warm.” Two strong arms wrapped around him, enveloping him in Levi’s musky scent of black tea and cheap cologne. He felt Levi rest his chin on the top of his head and smiled, closing his eyes.

“Oi oi, you can’t fall asleep. You’re meant to help me keep watch.” Eren could hear the smile in his voice.

“I’m watching,” he insisted, although it came out muffled and unconvincing through a yawn. He felt a warm puff of air on the top of his head as Levi laughed.

“Sure you are.”


	8. Superhero AU (28-Aug-2015)

Levi pulled up his mask just enough to allow him to scowl down at the window lock. He was  _sure_  he’d left it loose when he’d slipped out earlier that night; had Eren woken up since he’d been gone and locked it properly? He tried jiggling it again, shoving against the frame as hard as he could without making a noise that could possibly wake up his sleeping partner, but the window held fast.

_Fuck_.

Levi sat back on his haunches and sighed, shivering through his thin body suit; it was designed for mobility and camouflage, not to keep out the winter chill. The adrenaline was beginning to subside now and he could now feel the blossoming ache from where a lucky bullet had grazed the flesh of his upper arm. He need to get himself cleaned up and bandaged before morning came and Eren woke up; he didn’t want to make the other boy worry. Levi buried his head in his hands and closed his eyes. He couldn’t even bring himself to panic, he was just so done with the whole day. College was kicking his ass and he’d failed his last assignment, and now he’d fucked up the ambush he’d been planning for ages. He’d been staking out the drug house for the past three weeks, carefully keeping tabs on the comings and goings until he was absolutely sure his target was confirmed. He had been  _so close_ , but then again, he should have known something would go wrong; the whole day had been shit. And now he’d been spotted by his target, almost died trying to get away, and the whole sting had gone to bust. Several painstaking weeks of research, surveillance and planning down the crapper. Kenny would be  _pissed_.

“…Levi?”

“ _Ah_!” Levi almost fell off the roof at the sound of Eren’s drowsy voice. The window creaked agonizingly as Eren opened it, blinking sleepily up at him.

“Is that you?” He’d hoped to sneak in without the other boy noticing the sorry state he was in and he seriously considering making a dash for it now, but his limbs were aching and frozen as he stared dumbstruck at the sleepy green gaze squinting up at him through the glare of the streetlights. He very well could turn tail and run, but he still needed to get back into that room before day break, wash up, patch up his wounds and hide his gear. Eren seemed to be waiting for a reply, but Levi was more concerned by the fact that he’d just opened his dorm window to a black-clad figure with a balaclava pulled over his face and guns strapped to his thighs. Levi had warned him so many times about keeping vigilant knowing the kind of work he was entangled in. It was this kind of brash, reckless behaviour that make Levi loathe leaving the other boy alone for any duration of time. Eren was far from incapable of defending himself, but he could still be frustratingly thoughtless. “What are you doing? Come in, it’s cold.” No, what are  _you_  doing?

Still, Levi found himself nodding mutely and climbing in through the narrow frame and into their shared room. He couldn’t help cursing under his breath when the awkward wriggle through the window frame jostled his wounded shoulder, and suddenly, Eren was all over him.

“Oh my God, what happened?” He shoved Levi onto his bed and looked over him with wide, worried eyes, hands fluttering uncertainly as if he was afraid any contact would shatter him. “Are you hurt? Where? Do you need to go to the hospital?!”

“I’m  _fine_ , Eren.” Levi gritted his teeth against the pain. The blood was starting to congeal at least and he could feel where his suit was stuck to his skin, tugging at the wound with every movement. Eren stood back, wringing his hands and bouncing restlessly on the balls of his feet. If Levi could just convince him he was uninjured, he could clean and bandage himself up and pretend everything was fine. He knew how much the other tended to worry about this stuff. It wasn’t  _that_  bad and he’d had much worse, but Eren was always prone to overreacting.

Sensing he wouldn’t be getting much more from him yet, Eren turned towards the kitchenette and started bustling around preparing tea, banging down mugs on the cheap linoleum counter top and slamming cupboard doors. Levi sighed. Here it came. The inevitable anger replacing the initial concern and alarm.

“You said it was just surveillance again tonight. You said it was safe,” Eren huffed, turning on the kettle and drumming his fingers against the tea leaf tin as he waited for the water to boil. Levi began unstrapping his gear with a pained wince, resigning himself to another lecture.

“I have three supplementary exams in the next fortnight and mum just told me Kiki’s second litter is on the way; I don’t have the  _time_  to worry over you playing hero.” He actually threw up his hands at that; like a distressed housewife in a sitcom. Levi would have been amused if he wasn’t on the receiving end of the tirade. “If you’re going to get yourself killed, can you  _please_  be more considerate of my life plans?” The piercing scream of the kettle going off momentarily distracted the brunet, who continued to mutter profanities under his breath as he filled the teapot, head still shaking and foot tapping against the floor. He always did this, always went on a tangent about how Levi’s nightlife was a huge inconvenience to him to conceal how worried he really was. Levi noticed Eren’s hair wasn’t mussed with bedhead and he had dark circles under his eyes. As tired as he might look, Levi could tell he hadn’t slept properly the entire night. The desk lamp was on and Eren’s textbooks strewn all over it, notepads open and highlighters sprawled everywhere. Looked like he’d been at least trying to make some use of his inability to sleep. Perhaps Levi’s quiet exit hadn’t been as discrete as he’d hoped.  

“Eren…”

“Shut up, I’m not finished!” Except it seemed like he was because he dragged a weary hand down his face and he slumped wordlessly against the countertop. Levi gave him a couple minutes in case he really had more to add, but he seemed to have burnt himself out so he quietly got up and padded forward, positioning himself behind his boyfriend with his arms around his waist and chin perched over his shoulder. Eren made no sign of acknowledging him, but he also didn’t shove him away immediately either. That was a good start.

“I’m sorry. It really was meant to be a safe surveillance, but I was spotted.” Eren’s face was still concealed behind his hand, but his shoulders seemed to sag and his fist that was bracing his weight against the bench relaxed and unfurled. He was listening, so Levi continued, daring to press his lips into the juncture between Eren’s neck and shoulder so he breathed the words against his hot skin. “I’m sorry for not waking you like I promised, I’m sorry for making you worry, and I’m sorry you have to deal with all my shit.” He punctuated each word with a chaste kiss, slowly trailing up his neck until his face was buried in Eren’s unruly brown locks. He had to stand on his toes to reach so high, but he didn’t mind. He kind of liked it, actually, and he knew Eren liked it too.   
When Levi felt Eren’s hands clasp over his own and pull his arms tighter around himself, he allowed himself a small, triumphant smile and hugged his lover closer.

“I don’t mind your shit, Levi. I’m sorry for making it sound like you’re a burden; I know you’re dealing with everything I am and more. I try to be supportive, but you make me worry so much sometimes, and it doesn’t help that you seem to think sneaking around behind my back and keeping things from me will somehow make me worry less!” Levi pulled his arms back and for a moment Eren resisted, but then Levi turned him around to face him and pushed him back against the kitchen counter, pressing in close and fisting his hands in the worn fabric of Eren’s pyjama shirt. Eren automatically pulled him close, his strong arms circling protectively around Levi and pressing his lips against his forehead, just how he liked it best. He was far from incapable of defending himself, but sometimes it felt nice to just let his guards melt away and allow someone else to do all the fighting and protecting for you. To put away his vigilante persona and let Eren take care of him and keep him safe like he knew he would. Levi sighed and let himself melt against the taller boy’s chest. Let all the stress and anxiety that had built up all day drain away from his weary bones for long enough to let Eren seep between the hollow spaces, melting and soothing all the cracks like warm honey.

“I’m sorry.” His words were muffled against Eren’s chest, but it was obvious the brunet still heard them from the way he curled up around Levi more, his embrace almost tight enough to hurt.

“Ahh, no. I shouldn’t have shouted.” Levi felt Eren’s fingers thread through his hair, combing back the stray hairs falling onto his face. “You must be tired and hurt; let me take care of you.” And Levi nodded because Eren did it so well, and even after such a shit day, at least he came home to him at the end of it.


	9. Pining Levi Drabble (16-Aug-2015)

Levi sat with his chin resting on his knees as he watched the boy at the foot of his bed. When Eren cried, it was a full-body action. No faint sniffles and silent tear tracks, no pretending it wasn’t happening and shamefully trying to hide the evidence with averted eyes. His shoulders shook with loud, heaving sobs, and he angrily swiped at his running nose with a handful of tissues he then lobbed fiercely at the growing pile on Levi’s bedroom floor. Levi couldn’t find it in himself to be angry at the mess, not when Eren was a far bigger mess right now. He needed his immediate attention first, and Levi’s dilemma was that he didn’t know how to deliver.

When had that happened? They’d been friends for years and he was no stranger to Eren’s tears. He’d comforted him dozens of times before without a second thought, so why was he now frozen to the spot, his heart racing a thousand miles a minute and gaze locked helplessly on his best friend?

He knew why.

It had happened once he started being  _too_  aware of Eren’s presence. Weirdly so. His gaze automatically sought him out in crowds, the sight of his smile made his heart seize up in a way it never had before. When they changed for PE, Levi would suddenly find himself flustered in Eren’s half-dressed presence, and whenever they touched, even the  _briefest_  of accidental skin contact, Levi would turn into the most ridiculous, simpering mess and it took all his self-control to contain it.   
He was no fool; he knew what it meant.

“I’m so mad! I’m so mad at him, Levi!” Eren yelled the words at the ceiling before snatching another handful of tissues from the half-depleted box his friend held out to him. He blew his nose loudly, thick brows stitched closely together in a scowl. Eren did cry easily when he was angry, but this wasn’t one of those times. Him and Eren only become friends at the start of high school, but they grew close quickly, and now Levi’s knowledge about how the other functioned was borderline invasive. He’d wager he probably knew how Eren worked better than he did himself, which was why he knew that Eren’s tears weren’t the angry kind, despite how much the other would wish they were. Eren’s breaths came in shuddering bursts, he drew them in ragged between hiccups and sobs, and his frown slowly melted away until his expression was one so despondently glum, it made his heart squeeze painfully. He wanted to comfort the other like he used to. He wanted to draw him close to his chest and rub his back, but he didn’t trust himself anymore. His mind was dirty with ulterior motives, and his heart impure. He felt like any physical contact he made anymore with the other was soiled by his feelings and taking advantage of Eren’s obliviousness. So he settled for words instead, although he’d never been very good with them.

“I know, Eren.” Shit, he wanted to hit himself. Was that all he could do? Sit here and nod along to what Eren was saying, occasionally handing him a tissue? He was fucking useless and Eren needed so much more right now. Eren turned to him then, and God, Levi wished the floor would open up and swallow him whole. Anything to avoid looking at those beautiful green eyes swimming with tears beseeching him for help he had no idea he could offer.

“I hate him.” Eren whispered hesitantly, like he was testing the words out to see if they were the right ones to explain the tempest inside him. Levi felt awful for the sick feeling of joy sparked by hearing those words. Even after everything that Eren was going through, he still couldn’t help but feel the most shameful blend of relief and joy by what had started it.   
Eren sighed and looked down at his lap, twisting a tissue into shreds, his lower lip wobbling precariously. “No, I don’t.” Levi had to stop himself from looking disappointed.  _Stop it, this isn’t about you._  “But I want to.” He nodded, for lack of a better response to that, and leaned forward to pry the destroyed tissue from Eren’s fingers. Before he could fully withdraw them, though, the other quickly latched onto his hand, squeezing it almost painfully between his own. Levi’s heart leapt in his chest, and he looked up at the other in surprise. Eren was watching him, his gaze pleading. “Levi, it hurts.” His voice was wavering and soft. Finally, it seemed, the initial anger had ebbed away to sadness. Eren’s face didn’t become such an expression; it looked alien and  _wrong_. He suited dimpled smiles and ferocious scowls, not this. Against his better judgment, Levi shuffled closer, returning the pressure on Eren’s hand.

“What can I do?” He meant it. He would do anything Eren asked of him, and he recognised just how badly that could go. His brain screamed at him to back off, go grab some snacks from the kitchen or offer to put on a movie as a distraction. Anything that meant breaking off this dizzyingly prolonged eye-contact that was encouraging awfully tempting ideas that would only be regretted later on.

Eren barked out a dry laugh, and when he looked at Levi again his expression was grateful, albeit tinged with melancholy. Like he knew Levi’s words rung true, but it never occurred to him just how much and why.

“Would you beat him up for me?” He said it jokingly enough, nonetheless, it made Levi’s eyes flash and his grip on the others hands to tighten.

“If that’s what you wanted.” He wasn’t sure what to make of the way Eren looked at him then, and that sad little smile hanging around his lips. Levi decided he much preferred when Eren had been bawling his eyes out and cursing to this. At least he was loud and lively then, at least he was  _Eren_.

“I don’t think it is. I don’t know what I want.” Eren heaved an exhausted sigh, blinking down at their interlocked hands. He rubbed a thumb over Levi’s knuckles absentmindedly, and Levi wondered if he could feel the flutter of his racing pulse beneath his skin. “I want today not to have happened. I want not to hurt and I want him to love me like he did yesterday.” Levi bit back the harsh words that prompted and exhaled slowly through his nose instead.  _He didn’t love you yesterday either, Eren. What you’re asking for is to go back to lies and pretending._  But ignorance sure was bliss compared to this now, so Levi kept silent and nodded. Nodded because there was nothing else he could do. Because he was fucking useless, and while that asshole might have done this to Eren, he’d at least known what to do when Eren cried.

Eren smiled at him, though. He was fucking useless, but Eren still smiled at him like he couldn’t ask for anything better. He didn’t deserve that smile. Levi couldn’t help but raise his hand to wipe at the drying tear tracks on his friends cheek, and his breath stopped when the brunet closed his eyes and sighed at the touch, leaning his face into Levi’s hand.

“Just stay with me, Levi. That’s all I want right now.” Levi couldn’t move his hand. He was frozen in place, blinking rapidly and watching the way the other boys face lit up with a gentle smile as he rested his cheek in the curve of Levi’s palm. “And for God’s sake, hold me.” Levi swallowed dryly at the request. He took a deep steadying breath, and Eren opened his eyes to look at him, his eyes seeming to ask ‘ _well?_ ’  

Levi pushed down the pit of apprehension growing in his belly. He’d avoided contact with the other as much as he could since he’d realized his feelings, not trusting himself around Eren who only saw him as a friend. What would Eren think if he knew his best friend felt the way Levi did? That every time Eren put his arm over Levi’s shoulder or playfully leapt on his back in greeting, it made Levi’s heart hammer against his rib cage and butterflies dance in his stomach? That the hands he held and lent into now Levi had used to pleasure himself while thinking about him.  _Urgh_ , just remembering that made him feel sick. Made him feel  _guilty_.Those weren’t feelings fit for a friend, and Levi didn’t want to taint their friendship with his unwanted affections.

But Eren needed that from him right now.

Levi toed off his shoes and carefully crawled onto the bed properly. Eren’s smile was dazzling when he realised what Levi was doing, and it only served to make Levi feel worse because he felt like he was taking advantage of the others good faith.

“Lie down,” he directed quietly, and Eren hurried to comply, wiggling in place as he waited for Levi to pull up the duvet that had been kicked to the side and settle down, facing him.   
He dreaded this. He dreaded this, but at the same time, it made his heart soar. Eren shuffled down so his face was level with Levi’s chest, and he moved in to cuddle, his soft breaths warming Levi through his thin shirt. Levi wrapped his arm around the other’s shoulders and hugged him closer. How could the other not hear the way his heart was pounding? Surely he could hear it now, if not feel the flutter of it from where he was pressed up against his front? He would be found out for sure. This was better than anything he’d imagined while lying awake in bed at night; the feeling of  _actually_ having Eren beside him in bed, pressed close, intimate but innocent. Once Eren figured it out, this would all be ruined. Their friendship, too. The thought made Levi’s stomach lurch with fear. He couldn’t lose his best friend.

But Eren had asked for this. He’d needed Levi to do this, to be close to him, and so he would. As long as he would let him.

If that’s what he wanted.


	10. Sweet December (25-Dec-2015)

“Bye Eren! Do send Levi my best wishes!” 

The shop door groaned painfully as Eren pulled it open, the little bell above it tinkling.

“Alright Hanji, happy holidays!”

Hanji’s bespectacled head popped around a shelf, frowning. “And at least try to convince him to pop down to the square for the Yule festival, I’m sure he’d enjoy it.”

I’m sure he wouldn’t, Eren thought, but smiled politely nonetheless. Levi wasn’t the biggest fan of the cold, and to trudge around in the muddy slush of town being greeted by the townspeople as ‘the Christmas miracle’ was probably the worst way Eren could think of to force the man to spend his birthday. 

The biting winter wind was lashing at him before he was even half way out the door, leeching him of all his indoor warmth and making his cloak billow around him like a balloon. The chilly fingers of cold slipped under his layers and down his back, the wind buffeted against him like it was trying it’s hardest to convince him to stay in as well. Eren wrapped his arms around the fruitcake and sherry he had bought for the special occasion and, squeezing his eyes into slits against the gales, forged through the foot-high snow towards the fringe of town.

The snow outside the main traffic of the festivities, while not necessarily easier to traverse, was at least better looking. Undisturbed by wooden wagon wheels that churned up the frozen earth and turned the roads into filthy slush that then refroze into precarious, brown sleet, the fresh white snow looked pristine and cloudlike over the moors leading to the bluffs. Eren’s solitary footsteps looked lonely and wayward, meandering through the blue-tinged snowfall towards the cliff tops. No one else was foolish enough to trek out in this weather.

Captain Levi lived on the bluffs a two-mile hike from the town centre. The reclusive veteran had moved ‘into’ town several years ago, purchasing a sizeable plot of land too far from anywhere to appeal to anyone else. He lived alone with half a dozen dogs he’d accumulated over time, unable to work with his war injuries, so living off his rumoured-to-be impressive commission and tending to his land on his own. He’d retired from the military after a shrapnel injury to his leg which was how he’d first met Eren. Hanji’s apothecary was the only decent source of medicinal herbs for miles around, and Eren had been the one to serve him enough times that between their idle chit-chat alone, he’d confidently say he was the one who’d spoken to the enigmatic misanthrope the most out of anyone in all the time the Captain had lived there. He’d sort of made it his business to know about the older man then, even if it meant forcefully shouldering himself into his company so many times that eventually Levi had relented all efforts to shut him out from sheer futility. The Captain wasn’t exactly warm and welcoming in his disposition either, so as concerned as the other townspeople were for him, it took a special level of bull-headed determination to charge past the sort of social cues anyone else would have taken as a clear ‘go away’ and settle himself as solidly by the older man’s side as one of his faithful canine companions. Sometimes Eren wondered if Levi genuinely enjoyed his company or had rather just resigned to his fate. 

Levi’s farmhouse came into view now, squatting on the cliffs edge like a weary beast hunkering down against the winds. It was a stout little stone house that was wider than it was deep, a rickety patio running all around its rectangular edge with the floorboards so warped and twisted you had to hopscotch over the yawning gaps in between. Eren never knew how the Captain managed his way around with his problem leg; he had enough trouble himself. 

The sea gales were even stronger up here and drilled the snow against him with such force each flake felt like a needle driving into his frostbitten face. They whipped him from side to side like he weighed nothing, playing with his coattails and making him stumble and trip over his own feet and the piled snow. Eren loped the remaining distance to the farmhouse awkwardly, eager to escape to frigid cold, and banged on the front door with one gloved hand, cradling his precious cargo against his chest with the free one. He didn’t wait for an answer, shouldering in after a polite enough pause, and slammed the door shut behind him in a flurry of snowflakes. The Captain already knew he was coming anyway.

The regular chorus of barking greeted him as he bent over to toe off his winter boots. Four mangy dogs galloped and skidded around the corner towards him, barking excitedly. He was a familiar face around here now. Eren laughed as he tried to divide his affection equally between them all while trying to wriggle out of his overcoat and keep the cake away from their curious bouncing. They were never like this with the Captain, lavishing their attentions on their master with a reverent obedience that Eren would never be privy to. 

“Down!” he laughed weakly. “Okay, okay, where’s your papa, hmm?” 

The house was relatively still, which wasn’t exactly unusual. The dogs brought most of the life to the tiny indoors with Levi preferring minimal embellishments and knick-knacks. ‘Useless trinkets that only gather dust’ Levi has said the first time Eren had pointed out the impersonal and stark contents. It wasn’t inhospitable or anything, more like a generically decorated inn house; homely at a glance but only by design. Eren had made an effort to bring trinket gifts from then on, and was pleased that, despite the older man’s sneering and scowls, he’d yet to discard the random wind chimes and figurines he’d filched from Hanji’s store. 

The inside of the house was dark and quiet save for the scrambling claws of the dogs that packed around him. The only other sounds was the shifting and groans of the woodwork settling around him, the howls of the wind outside, and the rattles of the shutters fighting the onslaught of the wind. There were no yuletide decorations here, to Eren’s complete unsurprise. 

Even inside, the air was freezing and still, and it didn’t take Eren long to deduce Levi must be in the basement with the fireplace, probably with his remaining dogs huddled around him trying to rid the chill from his aching bones. His war wounds were especially troublesome in winter, and hiking up to town for treatment was a chore without a horse. Eren knew the Captain sometimes endured the pain at home than try bother someone to come help him, which was why he’d remembered to bring Levi’s ointment with him today. 

“Captain?” The basement door squealed on unoiled hinges as he pushed it open, and a gust of warm air embraced him. Yep, he was down there alright. 

The stairs leading into the belly of the stone house complained weakly with each step and Eren braced one hand against the wall as the dogs spilled in after him, shoving against his legs and yipping excitedly. Eren could hear the remaining dogs now, greeting their friends, as well as the crackling of an open fire and Levi’s quite murmurs as he tried to settle them down. The basement was Eren’s favourite room in the older man’s house only because it was the most cosy. The walls were exposed brickwork and the ceiling hung low, a melange of rugs patch-working the timber flooring until it looked completely carpeted. Levi’s bar occupied one corner of the tiny room, a small corner cabinet with smoked glass panels through which he could make out the shadows of the older mans prized collection. The other corner close to the staircase was his designated study area. His library was upstairs in one of the bedrooms, but this small niche was where Levi could usually be found, pouring over an old book lent from Hanji at the small cherry wood desk, a steaming cup of black tea neglected by his lamp as his dogs huddled around their master’s feet, dozing. 

Today, though, the Captain was in front of the fireplace. Eren placed the cake and sherry on the coffee table beside the faded armchair and gingerly stepped around the bustling furry bodies pressing in around him, eager to be close to both him and Levi at once. Levi barely glanced up at his approach, murmuring soothingly at the dripping, sorry looking dog that sat shivering in his lap as he dried it gently with an old towel. 

“He’s new.” Eren crouched in front of the chair, careful not to startle the nervous newcomer.

“She,” Levi corrected, shifting the dog in his arms. “Found her huddled half frozen under my deck this morning. Looks like a sheepdog; might have gotten lost in the snow.”

If Eren had to guess, he’d say she was a Blue Merle, with her long furred white coat with patches of black, grey, and brown along her back and head and startling blue eyes that watched him curiously. The dog edged towards him and sniffed, and when Eren offered up his hand, she leaned in to it eagerly, tongue lolling out and eyes closing as Eren scratched behind her ears. He looked up as Levi harrumphed.

“It took me three hours to coax her out from under the house with my best leg of ham then a further two to let me so much as touch her, and she loves you already.”

Eren grinned at the other man’s obvious disgruntlement.

“I have a way with grumpy old recluses.” He peeked up at the other but the Captain either didn’t get the jab or chose to ignore it. 

They were quiet for a moment, the conversation lapsing naturally and the silence between them comfortable. Eren watched Levi finish drying the dog and stroke down her mussed fur with lined hands. She huddled against his chest, eyes closing as his grooming turned into caresses, and Eren wondered if Levi had ever treated another human with the tenderness he tended to his dogs.   
“Do you enjoy my company?” Eren looked down to play with Chum, the oversized English bulldog who’d rolled over onto his back before him, eager for attention. The Captain was quiet for a moment and Eren wondered if he’d even heard. He had asked the question softly. “I just wonder sometimes. I did force my friendship on you.” He laughed, as if it might lessen the insecurity of the question. 

“I might be an old cripple, but don’t think you could force anything on me I didn’t want.”

“Is that a yes?” The dogs around them had settled down, heaped in a pile around the armchair and snoozing by the warmth of each other’s body heat and the hearth. Eren sat with his right side pressed against the chair, fingers playing with the drying fur of the new dog’s tail. 

“It’s a yes.” Eren looked up and found Levi staring into the dying fire, his expression pensive. The older man was starting to grey around the temples, but his face still retained its signature youthfulness. It used to drive Eren mad trying to guess the others age. He tilted his head so it rested on the arm of the chair, centimetres from Levi’s fingers, and nodded towards his gifts on the coffee table.

“I bought you sherry and a cake for your birthday.”

“Is it Christmas cake?”

Levi snorted when Eren hesitated.

“I didn’t want to! There were just no others in any of the stores. You have a very poorly timed birthday.”

Levi smiled, the lines at the corners of his eyes deepening as his gaze flicked down to him. 

“I’d apologise but it’s really not my fault.”

Levi excused himself to shower since he reeked of wet dog fur, carefully lowering the now sleeping stray to the floor among her new family. Eren arranged the dogs around the rug so he could stretch his legs out and leaned his head back against the armchair, letting his eyes flicker shut. He could hear the slosh of water from the washroom upstairs, the sound of firewood spluttering and spitting embers as the fire died, and the thrum of half a dozen – plus one – rhythmic breaths of the slumbering dogs splayed around him, protected in their cocoon from the snowstorm raging outside. He might have dozed off a bit because he awoke to the sensation of fingers in his hair, combing through the drying locks still plastered to his forehead. His breath might have caught for a moment, and he carefully opened his eyes a crack to look up at Levi whose fingers stilled when he noticed Eren was awake. He made to withdraw his hand, but Eren reached up and held it in place.

“Feels nice,” he mumbled drowsily in ways of explanation. He was being petted, he realised, and he rather liked it. 

“I can’t let you go home like this, you’re still dripping melted snow and I think it’s turning into a blizzard out.”

Was that an invitation? Eren resisted the urge to open his eyes again to gauge the Captain’s expression. It probably wouldn’t give anything away anyway. His fingers had resumed their gentle ministrations and Eren smelled Levi’s lemongrass soap clinging to his faded woollen sweater.

“Shame about the festivities.” Levi didn’t return to his armchair, instead lowering himself onto the rug beside Eren with a groan, his back sharing the leg rest. With the height difference, Levi’s arm bent awkwardly as his fingers knotted in his hair and after a moment’s deliberation, Eren shuffled over so he could lay down, resting his head in the other’s lap. If he was being petted, surely he was entitled to the same privileges as the dogs? The Captain didn’t protest immediately either, so slowly Eren let his muscles unwind.   
“I bet you’re glad you stayed in,” Eren continued, staring at the sea of sleeping dogs before him back-lit by the hazy orange glow of the fireplace. His thighs were swollen with taut, refined muscle under Eren’s head; he mightn’t have been in the service for over half a decade now, but he was still in peak condition. Eren just never noticed that much under all the layers, coats, and loose clothes the Captain tended to favour. This was the closest they’d ever been physically.

Levi hummed in response. One hand continued to card through Eren’s hair, methodically brushing it back from the nape of his neck and fluffing it out to dry, while the other slid over his shoulder and along his side until it came to rest at the dip of his waist. Eren wondered if it had been a subconscious move or if Levi was as hyperaware of the contact as he was. The weight of his hand was firm and distracting and Eren felt his heartbeat rabbiting in his chest as he tried to lay very still like the slightest movement might scare it away. The Captain’s fingers idly curled in the fabric of his jumper and Eren involuntarily shivered. The fingers froze and so did he.

“Are you still cold?” Eren blinked at the silhouette of Levi’s socked feet crossed in his line of vision. No he was not, but what was he supposed to say?  

Perhaps he was quiet a beat too long because he soon felt the older man shift beneath him and he was gently coaxed back upright. Levi twisted around to tug the beige throw-over off the back of the armchair and shook out the neat folds before swinging it around over his shoulder. As Eren watched, Levi lifted one edge and looked at him expectantly.

“Well?”

That was as close to an invitation as he would get. Eren shuffled over on his backside under Levi’s outstretched arm, trying not to look too eager in the process, and curled himself up against the older man’s side. 

“Is this okay?” Levi asked, his arm resting across Eren’s shoulders. Eren nodded, ducking his head to hide his burning cheeks. He almost jumped in surprise when he felt Levi tilt his head to rest his cheek against the top of his. He could smell Levi so strongly now; his face was buried against his neck and his body pressed against the other. He could feel the gentle rise and fall of Levi’s chest as he breathed, and the way his fingers curled around his shoulder, holding him close. Eren didn’t have asked if Levi enjoyed his company; curled up together in front of the fire in an effortless, comfortable silence wasn’t something you could do with just anyone. It was an unspoken thing, but whatever this was was special.

“Did you have a good birthday, Sir?” He spoke quietly, afraid to shatter the tranquility of the moment. Levi hummed and Eren closed his eyes, feeling the others voice rumble through his body when he spoke.

“The best in a long time.”


	11. Ganga Addare (5-Dec-2015)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **GLOSSARY:**  
>  _Ganga addare_ \- river love   
> _Kiribath_ \- milk rice dish eaten for breakfast on special occasions  
>  _Burgher_ \- half European/Anglo-Sri lankan

Levi woke at the crack of dawn to the sound of banging pots and shouting. He stared at the exposed rafters above his bed and idly wondered where the ceiling had disappeared to overnight before he remembered he wasn’t at the university dorms anymore. With a groan, he levered himself upright, swinging his legs off the bed and rubbing his eyes. The tacky plastic clock that was strung to one of the rafters with fraying yarn declared it ten to six in the morning. He glared at the pendulum clock dancing lazily in the spot, its face only visible for a couple seconds before the breeze sent it spinning back round again, and then at his wristwatch which confirmed the ungodly hour. His alarm hadn’t even gone off, that’s how early it was. Levi did the math; less than five hours sleep. An eight hour late night train journey followed by an uncomfortable motorbike ride up the hills, and he only snatched a couple hours rest. Levi prayed this was not the usual routine around here.

He washed his face in the sink cemented to the side of the outside wall of the house as dragon flies buzzed around his head. A little toy mirror hung to the wall above the sink a couple inches higher than he’d prefer, and he had to stand on his toes to shave, manoeuvring around the rust stains blossoming on the surface. He could feel his leather shoes slowly sinking into the soft earth beneath him and he had to adjust his feet every now and then, pulling his shoes free with a suctioning pop and setting them back down with a squelch. Everything felt wetter here, the humidity magnified by the greenery that pressed in around him, trapping the moisture under a canopy of thick, oily leaves. After a moments deliberation, he unfastened the top two buttons of his collar. He tamed his hair with his little plastic pocket comb and nodded at his rusty appearance, relatively satisfied. The bags under his eyes were ferocious but at least he’d dressed well. After only a handful of sleep, he wasn’t hoping for much more.

“Levi!” His auntie greeted him with outstretched arms, pulling him in for a kiss on either cheek like she hadn’t done the same just a couple hours earlier when he’d first arrived. She toed the mangy housecat out of the way and pulled out one of the rickety wooden chairs circling the dining table. “Sit, sit! I made  _[kiribath](https://t.umblr.com/redirect?z=https%3A%2F%2Fvernoncorea.files.wordpress.com%2F2010%2F12%2Fkiribath.jpg&t=MDI2ODMzZTBlM2NhM2QxMDZhMDcxYmM2M2E1YzA0NjY3YWVlOTBmOSxCRTlEV1h4Mw%3D%3D&b=t%3AQJgaNu-rEvHejUVtBiQ1hw&p=http%3A%2F%2Fmonsoondownpour.tumblr.com%2Fpost%2F134537986190%2Fganga-addare&m=1)_  for you.”

Mikasa swept into the kitchen not long afterwards all dressed for. Her dark hair was swept back into a sleek bun and she was in her light blue work saree, pleats ironed razor sharp down the front and shining name tag pinning her  _pallu_  in place. Last time Levi had seen Mikasa, she’d been running around the yard in just a diaper. His little cousin was not so little anymore. She eyed his outfit with a smug smile and Levi grimaced, his suspicions confirmed.

“Too dressy?”

“Definitely. The kids will make fun of you.” She hid her smile in her teacup as Levi sighed. He didn’t have anything more appropriate. His college budget allowed for only two types of clothing; job-interview formal or lounging-around-the-house casual. He’d just have to bear through the teasing, they’d get bored of it eventually.

“Did Hannes tell you the way to the school last night?” His aunt asked from the stove where she’d already started on lunch. Levi shook his head. “Never mind, Mikasa can show you the way.”

You’d think being so far from the city would mean more peace and quiet, but Levi found the sound of street peddlers and congested traffic was easily replaced with the din of nature around them. The town was right next to a waterfall and its currents and waters could be heard from anywhere, the constant crashing deluge fading to white noise in the background. There were so many birds this far inland too, their rainbow plumage like blossoms in the greenery overhead and their timed cacophony not unlike the musical horns of the lorries back home. Levi veered around a flock of speckled jungle fowl clawing hopefully at the muddy path. At least there were not as many cows up here, therefore less dung to dodge.

“You’ve grown a lot since I last saw you.”

“You haven’t.” Mikasa shot him a grin over her shoulder. Levi stared at her flatly but her smile only widened.

“…Still eight on the inside, apparently.”

“And you still eighty.”

It wasn’t hard to get along with Mikasa. She had the same caustic humor as he, and they found a comfortable topic discussing everyone Levi had met last time he’d visited with his family as a child. She told him Hannes still had the bar, Auntie Kirschtein had her bakery, and Uncle Grisha was still the doctor, although his wife had passed away since, and he’d taken on one of the village kids named Armin who’d managed to get into university and study medicine. Mikasa herself worked at the tiny adjoining pharmacy that catered to the whole village, and it was only a couple minutes away from the school house he’d be tutoring English at to the village kids during his break.

“It’s hard to get lost. Just ask anyone for directions; everyone knows anyone and all their business.”

“Excellent,” Levi said dryly. His cousin smiled.

“They’ve been talking about you too.” At his incredulous expression, Mikasa forged on. “’The most eligible bachelor’. You and Armin are the only kids that got into university from here, and Armin’s still too young to match-make.” Levi was unfortunately unsurprised. It’s not like they had anything else to gossip about.

“I’m not even from here,” He protested.

“Your mother is and that’s close enough.” Mikasa rattled off the names of all the aunties he should avoid and Levi dutifully committed them to memory. He knew how ruthless these mothers could be.

“We have a lot of pretty girls here…” Mikasa let the sentence hang suggestively. Levi glared at her sidelong.

“Not interested.”

“You can’t know that.” He almost laughed out loud at that. Oh, but he did.

He didn’t notice the river until they were right on top of it, the roar of the distant waterfall drowning out any other sounds. The winding green ribbon snaked around the hill and disappeared behind the next curve, easily fifty meters across at its narrowest. They had to climb down the steep bank to the narrow wooden jetty that jutted out into the water, holding onto thick, ropey vines on the perilous track. Levi went down first, his shoes slipping and skidding on the moist clay, before helping Mikasa down after him. Saree or no, she somehow made the descent look graceful.

Across the river, Levi could see a raft making its way over. It was a basic wooden platform made of narrow tree trunks roped together in a large rectangular plank. It looked sturdy, if rather outdated, with probably enough room for half a dozen passengers in total. Two ropes ran parallel to each other between the top and bottom layers of the raft, providing the tracks to keep it from drifting off course in the river current, while another rope ran shoulder height above it as some sort of railing for the passengers to steady themselves on. There were two men aboard the raft, the rower at the back with a long wooden pole for pushing off the riverbed, and the other with coiled rope ready in his hands to lasso around a jetty post.

“Is there no other way to cross?” Levi asked as the raft drew closer. It seemed rather slow and inconvenient a method of transport.

“Not unless you want to trek a mile in either direction for the next bridge. The rower’s Jean, he’s the bakers son, do you remember him?”

Levi squinted at the young man in question; he had rather distinctive two-toned hair, but nothing that struck him as familiar. He shook his head.

“And the other?” He looked like the taller of the two, with broad shoulders and tan skin darkened from the sun. His windswept brown hair was slicked back from his face probably with a combination of river water and sweat. Levi fought a grimace.

“The doctor’s boy, Eren. We used to play together often with Armin, I’m surprised you’ve forgotten.” Levi wasn’t. It had been many years now and he wouldn’t have even recognised Mikasa in the streets, let alone some long-forgotten playmate.  

“Ho, Mikasa!” Eren bellowed cheerfully, smiling wide and dimpled as the raft pulled in. Mikasa shook her head fondly, taking his offered hand as she stepped aboard.

“How are you so loud even this early?”

“Hello Mikasa!” The baker’s boy, Jean, piped up. He leaned over and smiled hopefully at her, and Levi could see instantly that he was smitten. Mikasa, for her part, responded with a cool nod before taking hold of the rope and turning around. When Levi caught her eye, he saw she was trying not to smile. The poor boy.

“Who’s your fancy friend, ‘Kasa?” Eren eyed Levi curiously, apparently not at all concerned that his shameless scrutiny was anything but subtle.

“This is my cousin, Levi. He’s here to tutor English.”

“Right!” Eren held out his hand and Levi shook it. His grip was firm and callused, and when he didn’t let go immediately afterwards, Levi realised he was waiting to help him board. He was embarrassed by the offer at first, but soon grateful when he stumbled as the raft shifted under his weight. Eren’s grip didn’t faltered, though, and the boy shot him a bright reassuring smile.

“Woah, I got you.” Levi retracted his hand with a small nod of gratitude before shifting towards his cousin, bracing as the raft pushed off.

“So what are you studying?” Eren asked as Jean continued to make moon eyes over his shoulder at Mikasa as best as he could while rowing. Eren pushed off the jetty with practised ease, the muscles in his arms tensing under dark skin. Levi looked away when he realised he’d been staring and found Mikasa watching him with a slight smile.

“Law at University of Colombo. Two years left.” Eren whistled appreciatively.

“Do you have to know good English for that?”

“Decently, yes, but my dad was  _[burgher](https://t.umblr.com/redirect?z=https%3A%2F%2Fen.wikipedia.org%2Fwiki%2FBurgher_people&t=OThkYTVjY2IzMWIyMTRiZGRiZWJmNjQ4MDg1Yjc0MzZmYjljODMwNCxCRTlEV1h4Mw%3D%3D&b=t%3AQJgaNu-rEvHejUVtBiQ1hw&p=http%3A%2F%2Fmonsoondownpour.tumblr.com%2Fpost%2F134537986190%2Fganga-addare&m=1)_. He was raised in an English speaking home so I learned ever since I was young.”

“Lucky.”

Levi supposed he was. He had a shot to get into university these kids never had because of his dad and his background. Just as easily his and Mikasa’s mothers positions could have been reversed, one marrying locally and the other a businessman, and  _he’d_  be the one with the job at the pharmacy while Mikasa went to college. He didn’t know what to say to that so he stayed quiet.

The trip only took a couple of minutes, and when they got off at the other side, Mikasa paid the fare and Levi agreed to buy her lunch in return as Eren tucked the handful of coined into a pouch at his hip.

“Good luck, sir!” Levi turned to see Eren enthusiastically waving them off and raised his own hand in an awkward half-wave.

“Why did he call me that?” Levi asked once they were far enough to be out of earshot. Mikasa laughed at his expression.

“You’re a teacher, aren’t you?”

“Yes but I’m not teaching  _him_.”

“You might as well be. If he hadn’t dropped out of school, he’d be doing his A levels now too.”

Levi pulled up short.

“He’s  _nineteen_?”

“Don’t look so horrified, he’s still an adult. He’s perfectly legal.”

“He’s over a foot taller than me. He’s  _huge_.” Suddenly, Mikasa’s words clicked and Levi frowned at her. “What do you mean he’s legal?”

Mikasa’s steps didn’t falter. She hiked up her saree and trekked up the hill towards town.

“Did I say that?”

The classroom he was teaching at was a plain, rectangular bricked hall built by the villagers clearly with practicality more than aesthetics in mind. The walls were messily hand-plastered and a shoddy layer of chalky, yellow paint applied over it, the brush strokes amateurish and uneven. Brightly coloured posters were tacked on the walls in a weak attempt to inject the drab room with liveliness, and rainbow streamers dangled in the breeze from where they’d been tied to the barred windows set high in the walls. There was a single blackboard on one wall and a lopsided wooden desk before it for the teacher. Two dozen wonky tables with industrial metal legs lined the length of the room in military-strict rows. He counted three times as many students. Levi stared at the group of kids ranging from middle-schoolers to A-level takers lined up outside waiting and thought to himself he might have to have more than one class a day at this rate. The children stared back, looking over his clothes with sceptical curiosity. He saw some of them turn to whisper amongst themselves, watching him from the corner of their eyes and sighed.

“Alright.” The whispers stopped and all eyes faced him. “Let’s get this over with, then.” It was only the first day of three weeks, after all.

It was almost four when the last of his pupils left for the day. Levi gathered up his folders and, locking the classroom door behind him, retraced his steps down to the jetty. Mikasa had gone home several hours ago, but he knew the way.

He found Eren was alone on his raft, legs dangling into the water and lungi pulled up past his knees so it wouldn’t get wet. He had a wooden flute in his hand that he turned over and over, tracing the grain with his fingertips.

“Can you play?”

Eren looked up with a start and when he saw Levi, he beamed like he was greeting an old friend.

“Just a little. How was your first day, Sir?”

“Fine, thank you.”

Eren began to rise as Levi drew closer and he quickly hurried on board before the younger man could offer to help again. He didn’t watch him push off the jetty this time, focusing on counting out the right amount of change.

_Nineteen_.

It was only four years difference, but he taught kids that age and that made it feel like a lot more.

“No Jean?” He asked. Eren laughed like he’d made a joke and shook his head.

“He only sticks around for Mikasa.” Right. Levi wondered if she knew. Of course she did; even he’d figured it out after just one meeting.

“Doesn’t it get tiring? All the rowing?” Without Jean, Eren would have to do it all himself. While many of the towns people lived on the same side of the lake Levi did, most of the shops and amenities were located on the other side. The raft must be used a lot.

Eren shrugged, barely breaking a sweat as he dug the wooden post into the soft mud of the river bed and pushed off with a powerful shove.

“You get used to it.”

That was it for conversation. There was only so much you could say in a couple minutes, and Eren spent the rest of the journey humming an unfamiliar tune. It wasn’t awkward, and Levi found he much preferred it to any stilted, forced pleasantries to fill the short time. He looked instead at the jungle around them as they drifted along, at the ancient mangroves fringing the river’s edge with their spidery white roots and the tell-tale flash of shadows in the green water as fish swam by. He could see a group of women a little way off further up the river, the sounds of laughter drifting down to him as they washed clothes on the riverbank, but other than that there were no other people in sight. It was very peaceful.

“See you tomorrow, Sir!” Eren called as Levi alighted on the warped wood of the opposite jetty.

“Please just call me Levi.” But Eren had already pulled out his flute and started playing. If he heard, he made no indication, settling down on the jetty’s edge to kick his feet in the water. The sound of the lilting tune followed Levi all the way home.


	12. Knock Knock (5-Nov-2015)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> SMUT  
> EXPLICIT SMUT CRACKFIC  
> PUNS  
> JUST.... SHAAAAAME ALL AROUND
> 
> VAMPIRES

Eren threw back his head and sighed. His hands fisted blindly in the mess of sheets beneath him, so overwhelmed with ecstasy he felt like he’d float away if he didn’t hang on tight enough.  His lover made his way up his body slowly, worshipping every inch of skin with kisses and caresses that made Eren flush hot and shiver with anticipation. The bedroom air was muggy and suffocated with the stench of sex and sweat, but Levi had a scent all his own; a cold, primitive tang, sharp like a warning, imploring to the more animal side of Eren’s instincts and warning of the predator nearby. ‘ _You should be running_ ,’ his instincts screamed, heart pumping adrenaline for the life or death encounter Eren knew wasn’t coming. The primal fear that remained mixed intoxicatingly with his desire, the push and pull of their contradiction overwhelming his thoughts until all he could think was  _more_.

_He wanted more of this drug_.  _He needed it inside of him_.

Eren’s breaths came in rapid bursts, growing short as his body coiled and tensed in expectation of his impending climax.

“Levi!” For God’s sake, he needed it  _now_.

Levi’s fingers were supernaturally cool against his flushed, sweaty skin. Their startling chill made Eren shiver, the contrasting temperatures only served to heighten his senses and the pleasure he felt raking its electric claws through every nerve. Infuriatingly unhurried sharp nails painted possessive claw marks up his legs, enjoying the way Eren quaked and shivered underneath him, lost to the sensations. How Levi did like to play with his food.

Eren clawed at his thighs, sweaty fingers scrambling desperately on slick skin, and lifted them up and apart, opening himself up for his lover. His chest heaved with his breaths, exhausted with the effort of suppressing his end. Eren dragged his head up to look at Levi towering over him, dark, pupil-less eyes drinking in every detail of his face. A pink tongue darted out to lick his lips and taste the air and Levi suppressed a moan. Eren could tell he wasn’t the only one close to losing it; Levi’s pupils had outgrown his iris’ until the whites had disappeared and the sharp points of his fangs protruded past his lips in anticipation. 

He was hungry.

“ _Eren_.” Levi’s voice was all but a growl, unrecognizable in his lust and hunger.

“Levi, please!”

“You know what I need, Eren.”

The brunet felt tears prick his eyes. His body so overwhelmed and close it begged for release, but he refused. Not until Levi was inside of him; he would not cave first.

“Levi,  _Levi_.” He sounded so wrecked, so  _desperate_ , that he normally would have felt ashamed of how he begged. “I  _need_  you, Levi.” He pulled his lover closer, felt the hot length of his member tease his entrance and he could have wept.

“Eren…”

A wet sob tore past his lips. He was just so gone, and Levi still held back. It was sweet torture, but he craved release.

“ _Please_ …”

“Eren!” Levi suddenly pulled up and out of his embrace, staring down at him with a ferocious scowl, teeth bared with the effort of his restraint. Eren blinked up at him dumbly. “For the love of fuck, you know the drill. I need to be  _invited in_.”

Eren could feel his cock wilt. He covered his face with his hands, voice muffled through his fingers.

“My ankles are all but hooked around my neck and I’m literally begging you, how much more transparent can I be?”

He could feel Levi’s growing exasperation emanating off him from above.

“Yes but you know how literal the Old Laws are. I need vocal, enthusiastic, and  _explicit_ consent to be able to enter.”

“Christ…” Eren wanted to sink through the bed and into the pits of Hell itself in his mortification. Fuck the Old Laws. He drew in a deep breath and rolled his eyes, staring hard at the ceiling as derision dripped heavy from his tone.

“ _You can cum in, Levi_.”

“Thank you. That really wasn’t so hard, was it?”

“You really wanna know what’s not hard anymore?”


	13. END SCENE (29-Mar-2016)

_Every time I see you, I die a little more_  
Stolen moments that we steal as the curtain falls  
It’ll never be enough 

* * *

Eren was certain his thundering heartbeat could be felt through his chest, that’s how close they were. Levi’s arms around him felt so solid and certain that for those few seconds, nothing around them existed. Just him and Levi, breaths warming each other’s lips and fingers desperately tangled in the others clothes as they pressed as close as their bodies would allow. Like nothing could pry them apart again. 

His fingers traced the angle of Levi’s jaw and stilled over his lips, dry, parted and inviting. Grey eyes flicked from his uncertain gaze to his own lips and back again, and then Levi was reaching up on his toes to close the gap between them. He tugged Eren down with the hand fisted in his hair, his grip as insistent and needy as every screaming atom in Eren’s body that had craved this moment for what felt like years.

He closed his eyes. Partly to treasure the moment with all his senses, and partly because when the spell broke, he didn’t want to see the other’s face. He wanted to savour the look of clawing need in Levi’s expression while it lasted. He wanted to sear it permanently into his memories. None of his fantasies had ever done the image justice, and it made his heart ache and want almost unbearably.

“Cut!”

The word sliced through the silence like a guillotine. The world was still for a nanosecond, as if deciding whether to humour Eren’s wishes for a fraction longer. The tears clinging to his eyelashes fell, splashing hot and wet against his cheeks and bringing him back to the surface as time restarted. Just like that, Levi’s breath was no longer against his lips. His finger’s slipped from his hair and his warmth was gone, leaving Eren’s hands hovering in air that felt harsh, cold, and empty in comparison.

“Wow, Eren. That was stunning.”

Eren’s eyes cracked open, wincing against the blaring stage lights.

“And the tears! What a perfect touch! Your immersion in the role is unbelievable.”

Hanji’s shouted praise was a background hum. His attention was focused on Levi who still stood before him, only now out of arms reach. He had his hands stuffed in his pockets as he smiled, nodding along to Hanji’s words. Like that moment, as charged and electric as it had felt, was just another day’s work.

He supposed it was. They were just actors, after all. Nothing more than co-stars when the cameras weren’t rolling.  

“Seriously, kid. You did good.”Levi’s voice was quieter than their director’s; only meant for his ears. “An actor is only as good as his partner, and you made that whole scene feel effortless.”

Praise from Levi Ackerman was a rare and precious thing and it should have made him glow with pride, but it only made Eren’s stomach twist in knots. He swallowed past the lump in his throat and forced on his brightest smile, wiping the tear tracks from his cheeks.

“Thanks.”

He’d earned the praise. He’d even fooled Levi, after all. 

 


	14. Wildwood (11-Jan-2017)

The Wolf Folk came into town that Saturday. All the children at the orphanage lined up along the wire fence to watch them roll in, craning against the sagging wire mesh to catch a glimpse of furry ears or sharp fangs. The bright caravans looked like technicolour train carriages , bouncing over the rocky terrain and winding down the mountain road in a long, serpentine parade. The Sister’s at the orphanage warned them not to get to close. They said the Wolf Folk ate little children like them.

They certainly were unlike anyone Levi had ever seen, but he saw no fur nor fangs. All he saw were beautiful brown people, smiling and laughing in their gaudy entertainer’s garb, bells on their ankles and sashes in their hair. Levi watched one caravan full of children rattle by, brown skinned kids no older than himself staring back at him with wide eyes and gap-toothed grins. They looked happy and bright. He wondered what they’d done to earn the distrustful and wary looks the townsfolk sent their way, and he wondered how they didn’t seem to mind it.

On Wednesday, Levi went down to the stream that ran behind the orphanage. He took his homemade catapult and a bruised apple.

Down by the stream he fished out a few smooth, small stones from the riverbed. He placed his apple on the log that ran across the rushing water and practice a few shots. He knocked the apple in on the fourth try.

“You’re very good at that.”

Levi startled and looked up from his perch. Across the river was a boy he’d never seen before crouched by the river back with his elbows on his knees. He wasn’t from the orphanage, and he didn’t look like he was from town. His skin was brown and he wore patched and faded clothes that, despite their obvious wear and tear, still looked brighter than anything people in town wore.  When he smiled, and he never seemed to stop, a snaggletooth bit into his lower lip. He had the greenest eyes Levi had ever seen.

“You’re one of them folk.” Levi couldn’t bring himself to say ‘wolf’. He wasn’t sure if they called themselves that, or if it was the sort of thing murmured behind hands out of earshot.

“Yes.” The boy looked over his shoulder back the way he must have come. Over the grassy hill rose a column of grey smoke from a nearby campfire. Levi knew the Wolf Folk had set up their camp in the fields neighboring the orphanage grounds, but he hadn’t thought they’d wander. “Can I have a shot?” The boy eyed Levi’s catapult hungrily, grubby fingers twitching on the hem of his cut-off trousers.

Levi considered the boy carefully. He’d learned young there were somethings you couldn’t share  with other children. He had to share everything at the orphanage, and some times he had to keep things secret to keep safe. His catapult was one.

But the wolf-boy was looking at him hopefully, and he was smiling hopefully. He looked so silly in his multi-coloured clothes; an indigo-dyed shirt hand-mended with orange and green patches on the elbows and chest. The orphans might share clothes and hand-me-downs, but they were all at least in one piece.

“Be careful.” Levi surrendered his precious toy, holding it out across the narrow stream. The wolf-boy looked delighted, springing up to take it and cradling it gently in his hands. “My name is Levi, by the way. What’s yours?”

“Eren.”

Eren didn’t immediately go foraging for stones, instead turning the catapult in his hands and inspecting it from every angle like he’d never seen one before.

“Are you really a wolf?”

“I’m a cub. I don’t have my big-boy teeth yet.”

Levi couldn’t tell if he was joking, but then Eren bared his teeth for display and Levi saw that what he’d thought was a snaggletooth were actually prominent canines.

“Do you really eat children?”

Eren’s nose scrunched up at the question, but he didn’t look up, testing the elastic of the catapult with his index finger.

“I  _am_  a children.”

“I mean a children like me.”

“Why would I eat you?” Eren glanced up at him and looked him over. “You don’t look very tasty. Do you eat children?”

“No!”

Eren looked genuinely puzzled.

“Then why would you ask such a thing?”

Levi didn’t know. He felt silly.

One of the Sister’s called his name and Levi looked back. Thankfully they couldn’t see him, or he’d get in all sorts of trouble.

“I have to go now.”

Eren nodded and passed his catapult back to him.

“Will you be back here tomorrow?”

He titled his head to the side like a puppy, watching Levi with big green eyes.

“Maybe.”

Thursday came and Levi found himself back at the river. This time he brought two apples, both fresh. Eren was already down there when he arrived, and Levi drew up short when he saw the other boy squatting in the mud by the water weaving something from the reeds.

“You’re wearing a dress.”

Eren looked up. He looked back down at his bright yellow sundress, then back up at Levi blankly.

“And you’re wearing trousers. And a shirt.”

“But you’re a boy,” Levi insisted. He sat on the grass on his side of the river. How was Eren not embarrassed?

“Yes. Do you like it?” He stood up and held out the edges for display. He smiled, dimpled and bright, and looked to Levi expectantly. “My mama made it for me. Yellow is my favourite colour.”

He just didn’t seem to understand. Did all wolf-boys wear dresses? Perhaps this was why the townspeople looked at them funny and drew back when they passed. But it was a nice dress and Eren did look pretty. It didn’t seem enough of a reason to dislike someone to Levi.

“It’s nice,” Levi said, and Eren beamed proudly.

They shared an apple, Levi leaning across the stream to pass the fruit over.

“Do you want to come to my caravan for dinner? I told mama about you, and she said I could invite you over if your parents don’t mind.”

“I’m not allowed.”

Eren frowned and put down his apple.

“You didn’t even ask first,” he pouted. Levi shook his head.

“I don’t have parents.”

“That’s impossible. Everybody has parents.”

Did the Wolf Folk not have orphans either?

“They died when I was little.”

The wolf-boy chewed this over with a troubled expression.

“What about your pack?”

“My family? I don’t have one.”

“We can share mine, if you like.”

Levi didn’t have the heart to tell him he didn’t think it worked like that, but he smiled, because it was a nice thought.

“I’d like that.”

On Friday, Eren wore a violet shirt and brown pants. He sat on the log that bridged their sides of the river, and didn’t smile when he saw Levi.

“We’re leaving tonight.”

Levi’s steps faltered. The apple in his hand dropped and rolled down the grassy slope into the water.

“Oh.”

Eren stood up and crossed the makeshift bridge. He was as light on his feet as a dancer, he didn’t even struggle for balance. He stopped in front of Levi.

“Do you want to come with me?”

“I don’t think I’d be allowed.”

“You could run away with me.”

Levi began shaking his head and Eren suddenly slapped his palms on Levi’s cheeks, stopping the motion and forcing his eyes on him.

“Why not?” He demanded.

Levi pulled out of his grasp with a wet sniff. He shook his head again, a lump in his throat.

What a world he must live in where he could truly believe such fantastical possibilities. Levi was an orphan. Small, taciturn, unwanted.

“ _Levi_.”

Levi turned away and ran back up the hill, ignoring Eren calling his name behind him.

Levi sat on the hill beside the Wolf Folk’s campsite and watched the caravans resume their journey. All that was left behind were the streaks their wagon wheels had left in the yellowing grass and the smoky remains of their campfire. The caravans fell neatly in line back onto the main road leading out of town, continuing their colourful journey as if tugged along by an invisible string, the sound of bells and laughter trailing in their wake. The whole town seemed to sigh with relief when they were gone. A few of the other orphans were sad to see them leave, if only because they’d been something of interest to have around. Only Levi seemed to really miss them, and the stream behind the orphanage never felt the same.

Levi was helping Miss Ral teach the younger children their letters when the class was interrupted by a knock on the door.

“You have a visitor, Mr Ackerman.” Sister Judith’s nose pinched as she said the words. Levi racked his mind for an explanation. Something to explain the Sister’s sour expression aside from her general, inexplicable dislike of him.

“Is it about the broken fence? I already told Graham I’d fix it on the weekend.”

Sister Judith left without a reply, and Levi shared a bemused look with the young school teacher.

“Go on, Levi,” Petra urged. “Before she has to herd you out.”

There was a beautiful man waiting for him outside the main building. He sat on the stair rails, head tilted back into the sun as several Sister’s nearby whispered into their hands and shot pointed looks in his direction. Levi was certain that, as arresting as his appearance was, they were more likely discussing the unfortunate patchwork of colours that made up the shirt he wore. Levi’s heart clenched at the sight.

“Are you a wolf man yet?”

Eren turned to face him, and of course he was smiling. It was still the same him, same dimples, same hair, same stunning green eyes. Levi squinted and nodded to himself.

“Your teeth do look bigger.”

“All the better for eating little children with.”

How long had it been? Four years? And not a single day gone that Levi hadn’t wondered how things might have been had he left with Eren that night. Rationally, he knew it wouldn’t have happened. Eren’s mother would probably have scolded them both and sent Levi packing back the way he’d come. They’d been children, prone to absurd, drastic ideas, and he’d entertained the futile notion of running away long before he’d met Eren. Then as the years drew on and the Wolf Folk didn’t return, Levi began to wonder if it had all been a fantasy his young mind had conjured up as respite from the long weary days of loneliness at the orphanage.

But here was Eren anyway, fresh out of a youthful fantasy.

“I didn’t hear anything about the Wolf Folk passing through.”

“I took a little detour alone.”

Why?

It was a wonder Eren even remembered this small, sad town. He must meet new people every place they made camp, and Levi was just one quiet, sullen orphan he’d befriended the few days he’d stopped by.

Eren watched him, head tilted like a puppy.

“We don’t eat people, Levi.”

Levi snorted.

“I know, I was joking—“

“But we have been known to snatch them. That’s what the stories say, at least. My mother snatched my father once, years and years ago.” Eren smiled at Levi, or perhaps it was at a memory. “He said he saw her and it was like he was under a spell. He had a job, a plan, and a future in his city, but then he looked at her and it all felt drained of colour by comparison. He dropped everything and never looked back.”

Looking at the man before him, Levi couldn’t help but understand a little too well what Eren’s father had meant. It was like where ever Eren went, he made the world around him look insipid beside his brightness. He wouldn’t be surprised if he’d lured dozens of people like that, but thinking about that ruffled Levi for a reason he couldn’t understand.

“Have  _you_  snatched many people?”

“I tried once when I was very young,” Eren shrugged and smiled sadly. “I was so sure it would work, I was so hopeful. But instead he ran away. I didn’t understand why and thought maybe I was broken. He seemed so lonely, yet he still didn’t want me.”

Levi felt like his throat had closed up. He could mean anyone. He cleared his throat.

“…And you gave up? Surely there were others?”

Eren’s eyes pinned him in place like emerald daggers.

“Did  _you_  have others?”

Levi searched for words. It had been years, it had been a fleeting dream from a forlorn childhood.

“Eren, you knew me for three days…”

“It only takes a minute to snatch someone. The curse goes both ways.”

Then why hadn’t it worked? Why hadn’t he dropped everything and gone? Instead he was left behind wondering if it had all been a vivid dream, and feeling lonelier for having known what he missed. It felt absurd, but Levi felt a surge of nonsensical anger at Eren for not doing the job right back then. For leaving him behind, something vital snatched.

“You cursed me and left.”

“I came back. It took me a while, but I realized I had to come back.”

Yes, but four years later!

Left scoffed and made to turn away, but Eren darted forward and seized his hand. Several feet away, Sister Judith watched from the dining hall window, face pinched with disapproval.

“Come with me. Leave this place, you’re not happy here.”

“Come with you?” Levi demanded, his voice a harsh whisper conscious of their audience. “Where? I’m not one of you! What – what would your mother say?!”

Levi didn’t expect Eren to laugh.

“Mama? She wouldn’t say anything. She’d understand.”

Levi had never left this town. In fact, he’d never left the orphanage. He’d grown up and stayed on as the handyman, close to what was familiar in the only place he understood, if never exactly fit in. How could he survive a nomadic lifestyle with people who weren’t even  _people_? Lively and bold and confident, different to him in every way? When Eren grew tired of his insecurity and reticence, would they leave him behind again?

“I’m not like you,” he murmured.

“Of course you’re not.” Eren scrunched his nose up in bewilderment like he used to. “I don’t like you because you’re like me. I like you because you’re like you.”

“Levi!”

Sister Judith emerged from the mess hall, hands on her hips and a thunderous scowl on her face. Levi looked at her in panic as she approached, as inevitable as a storm front.

“Run away with me, Levi.”

What would he leave behind? A cot, a change of clothes, and an old catapult. Who would miss him? The children and Petra. They would understand. He had been them once, and they all wanted to run away one day.

Levi took Eren’s hand and ran.

* * *

A thousand miles away Levi sat on the roof of a caravan with his wolf man. Eren wore a pine green dress and a pearl white smile and held Levi’s hand firmly in his. Below them roared a raging bonfire surrounded by their shared family. Patchwork colours and exotic silks swirled around in a wild dance, and the air was filled with laughter and music.

He had never been happier.


	15. You're Too Young To Hate The World (29-Dec-2016)

Levi looked up at the boy in his garden, soil streaking his cheeks like war paint as he wrestled a young magnolia from its pot.

“What makes you think I hate the world?” He asked.

“I don’t know. The way you –  _oof_! – talk about people.”

“I just don’t like most people. The world’s not so bad.”

Levi sipped his tea, his free hand massaging the scar-tissue stump that was all that remained of his left leg. It was difficult to not be a little bitter after the things he’d lived through and seen. He was younger than most were by the time they turned into grumbling, cynical recluses, but he was an exception. He’d earned his place here, on the house at the end of the lane.

Eren laughed, wiping the beaded sweat off his brow with the back of his gardening glove.

“How subtle. I’ll be out of your hair in no time.”

He had pollen in his hair, and pink redbud blossoms. He looked like something off a hand painted postcard. Levi had loved gardening ever since he was young. It was such a rewarding, relaxing, productive distraction until the burden on his leg (or what was left of it) became too much. Luckily he realised soon enough sometimes watching someone else do it was just as relaxing. 

“I didn’t mean you. You’re the exception.”

Eren pat down the dirt around the newly planted magnolia and sat back on his haunches proudly.

“‘The’ exception, or ‘an’ exception?”

“What difference does it make?”

His eyes crinkled around the edges when he smiled. So much time out in the sun, he’d be as weathered as an old sailor before he hit his thirties. Or they could just be laugh lines. He had a face that was made for laughing.

“The difference is how flattered I’d be.”

“If I flatter you enough, will you also change the bathroom light before you go?”

Eren rose to his feet, dusting the dirt off his gloves as he considered the trade.

“I might need a little more flattery than that.”

“Come inside, then.” Levi levered himself up by the armrests and waited for the other to climb up the porch steps. Eren offered his arm like an invitation to dance, and Levi took it with equal ceremony. He smelled like earth and sweat and honesty. “I’ll work on it over dinner.”


	16. Nightwatch (13-Dec-2016)

The blue moonlight was a shifting patchwork on the warped wooden platform. Between the ceaseless hiss of the perpetual forest and the haunting shrieks of the winged predators prowling above, Levi couldn’t sleep even if he wanted to. No torchlight up here to keep him company in the darkness, nothing that might draw an unwelcome eye. He was alone up here. He was cold, bone-tired, vigilant, and tense until dawn. He was a thousand things, but he wasn’t afraid. He was a Scout.

“Levi!”

And he was in trouble.

Eren’s green eyes stared up at him through the leaves below, bright with excitement and mischief.

“Let me up!”

“No.” But he did anyway. Might as well been the Chieftain himself issuing him an order for all the willpower Levi had to deny the hushed request. Didn’t stop him from grumbling. He heaved up the trapdoor and stepped aside as Eren scrambled into the watchtower platform, still in his nightclothes.

“Your father is going to skin me.”

“He doesn’t have to know.” Levi eyed the incriminating green patches on the others nightshirt doubtfully. The Chieftain always knew. Eren had the subtlety of a blind ox in a flower bed, but to keep Eren from the treetops was as futile a feat as taming a Nightstalker.

The wheeling keen of one such beast snapped their attention immediately upward; Levi’s gaze wary, Eren’s awestruck. The massive creature wheeled slow circles a hundred feet above, its pronged, jagged wingspan a foreboding silhouette against the night sky. A wild female, judging by her size, out stalking prey to feed her young.

“Incredible,” Eren breathed reverently. His wide eyes tracked the monstrosity’s movements, fingers a white-knuckled grip on Levi’s sleeve. The Scout never could comprehend the Chiefling’s fixation on the beasts. Most of the villagers were petrified of them.

The sound of synchronized whistling heralded the arrival of the Winged Scouts. A swarm of shadows converged over the village from above, the agile, swooping silhouettes of the Riders on their winged steeds. Their swords were bright, arcing slashes of flames against the sky as they shepherded the threat away from the village in tight formation. Levi and Eren watched the aerial contest with rapt attention.

“Imagine what she’d look like up close,” Eren murmured, almost sounding dismayed as the Nightstalker soared away to continue her hunt elsewhere. Levi snorted.

“Big. Toothy. Inevitable.”

Eren’s lips twitched upward and his green eyes slid sideways to regard Levi.

“I envy you, sometimes. One day you’ll be up there too, and I’ll just be down here. Watching.”

Eren scared him when he talked like this. Like the Nightstalkers were a beautiful mystery to be discovered and not apex predators massive enough to shroud a small village in the shadow of their wingspan. The boy had the self-preservation instinct of an adventurous pup. One day the Chieftain wouldn’t be around to keep his son out of trouble. That job would fall to Levi, like it was his father’s job to protect and guard the Chieftain before him.

“You’ll be down here running a village,” Levi corrected. “Besides, if you were up there with me, who would I have to impress with stories of my daring exploits?”

Eren stared across the treetops into the ghostly fog that obscured the horizon from all sides. Staring at that for hours on end never failed to make Levi feel very small and alone indeed. Eren, however, watched that same unfathomable distance with a kind of yearning Levi imagined he only ever wore when he looked at the boy before him. An incomprehensible desire that eluded all reason.

“You have everyone to impress,” Eren replied almost absently. “Adina, maybe. She watches you so much already. Perhaps she’ll watch you when you’re the one up there.”

Levi frowned.

“I want  _you_  to watch me, not Adina.”

“I don’t want to watch you from so far away.” Eren said primly, his bottom lip jutting out. “How would you feel watching me fight winged monsters from afar? Imagine I fell. I would sooner die than watch so helplessly.”

“I won’t fall,” Levi said, affronted.

“That’s not the point.”

“Chief’s don’t fight Nightstalker’s.”  _Scouts do._ I _do. It’s_ my _job to protect_ you _._

“Chief’s can do what they want.” Eren had that Saintforsaken set to his chin. That stubborn jaw that warned trouble ahead for anyone who opposed him. “Let’s see you try and stop me.”

Levi sighed and turned his eyes skyward in a silent prayer.


	17. Vet Nurse Levi (4-May-2017)

The vet nurse was cute.

He wore scrubs covered in colourful little cartoon animals and his sneakers were lime green. He cradled cats with both arms, staring deep into their eyes as he carried a one-sided conversation with all the gravity and solemnity of a conversation between adults. He didn’t make his voice higher or speak adorable nonsense. He picked them up and asked them, by name, how they were feeling. He nodded, his sombre expression made more so by the frown that would crease his brow.

“I heard, Grandpa, you had another belly ache.”

Grandpa slowly reached up one paw and placed it gently on ‘My Name Is Levi!’s chin. The vet nurse nodded, thin lips puckered in thought.

“I’ll see what I can do.”

Levi looked at Eren and it was amazing how his expression didn’t exactly change but there was something else that shifted in his countenance. Something that went from the subtle familiarity with which he handled Grandpa to a sort of deadpan surprise.

“You’re not Mikasa.”

“No, um.” Eren wrung his beanie in his hands. “She’s on vacation. I’m pet-sitting.” He looked nervously at Grandpa who had his paws curled against his chest. He looked at Eren almost accusingly with big yellow eyes. You did this to me, they seemed to say. There will be a reckoning.

“What happened.” Levi didn’t pose it like a question. He said it like it didn’t matter; he wouldn’t believe whatever nonsense Eren came up with anyway, he’d figure it out soon enough. He said it like he was on Grandpa’s side already. Eren felt ridiculous. More than the early drive to the vet and Mikasa’s inevitable wrath, he resented Grandpa for making the cute vet nurse look at him like he was the world’s biggest idiot.

“He’s an indoor cat—“

“I know.”

“Right.” Eren looked down at his feet. Levi’s stare was unwavering. “He ran out last night while I was putting out the garbage. I think he ate something weird.”

The vet nurse sighed. He shook Grandpa a little in his arms. A gentle reprimand.

“You, sir, know better.”

“I’m sorry. God, Mikasa is going to kill me.”

“This happens more often than you think,” Levi said. He looked up at Eren with an arched eyebrow. “Boyfriend?”

Eren looked at him, startled by the bluntness.

“No, I’m single.”

Levi’s eyes widened and Eren only then realised his mistake.

“Ah!” They stared at each other, Eren in mortification and Levi in shock. “Ah! No! Yes – I mean no! She’s my sister!”

Eren felt him shrink in on himself. The butterflies in his belly turned into a flight of kamikaze’s plummeting devastatingly into his gut.

Then Levi smiled.

Just a faint upward tilt to the corner of his lips. His eyes were laughing, though, and now he was actually looking at Eren properly.

“You’re Eren, right? Mikasa’s mentioned you before.”

“…Really?” To her vet nurse? “Why?”

Levi looked down at Grandpa and Eren had the nagging suspicion he was avoiding Eren’s eye.

“You should ask her.”

* * *

“Hello?”

“You scheming cow.”

“ _Hi_ , Eren,” Mikasa’s tinny voice said sweetly through the receiver. “The holiday’s going great, thanks for asking! How are you?”

“I panicked! I thought I’d killed Grandpa!”

“Arsenic couldn’t kill that dumb cat. He’s just a dramatic old shit who’s just senile enough to enjoy visiting the vet. Did you meet Levi?” And Eren could tell by the smug edge to her tone she knew everything already.

“I hate you. I’m never cat-sitting again. That was mortifying, I’ll never live this down.”

“No, bud, you  _owe_  me. When’s the date?”

Eren sighed.

“Next Wednesday.”

 


	18. Sabre Two(th) (22-Feb-2018)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Continuation of Chapter 1:SABRE of _The Universal Constant_ (please read first)(or don't and go ahead and be confused)

Eren stomped the snow off his boots as he entered the Chief’s tent. The place always smelled musty even in the dead of Winter, the earth as soft as Spring from the warmth of the glowing ember fire and piles of the thickest pelts layered over the floors and tent walls. He tried not to look to nervous, hiding the anxious shifting of his feet as a bid to drive the chill from his bones. He nodded a silent greeting to the Chief and commander Shadis, then noticed Jean’s figure sat in the shadows with a hint of puzzlement. Eren didn’t have much of an idea why he’d been called in from watch duty, but anything beat sitting in a frozen tree overnight even if he was about to be chewed out, which – given Jean’s presence – was the most plausible explanation. Then again, they usually didn’t bother with such formalities as this, and he especially didn’t recall doing anything worth the  _Chief’s_  personal attention. This could only be bad or worse, and as Eren placed a fist over his heart and bowed his head deferentially, he braced himself for the worst.

“Eren. Thank you for meeting us today.”

Eren shot a glance to Jean, but the other warrior was busy inspecting the shine on his blade to give him any clue of the proceedings. He didn’t look tense or anything else that might suggest a stern disciplining, though. He turned back to the Chief and bowed his head again. The barrel-chested man motioned for him to seat himself on the balding floor pelt and Eren did so.

“Have you heard the new?” Shadis asked. Eren looked at him blankly. “This Winter’s final Fire Trial was to end today. The Smilodon Tooth.”

Oh yes, Eren had known that. The initiated Warriors followed the Trials even more intently than prospective participants; it was actually enjoyable now that they weren’t desperately taking notes on critical strategies for themselves, and to watch the hopefuls blunder through mistakes they themselves recalled committing was much more amusing from a safe distance.

“Yes, Sir. I have been following the progress.”

“One boy did not return,” Shadis said. He’s intense eyes were trained on Eren’s face for some sort of reaction, but Eren didn’t know what he was looking for. There was always a handful of no-show boys at this final stage of the trial, determined not to return without their prize or holed up in a cave somewhere having lost their orientation in the snow and storm. It was normal for parties to go out and either drag them home or rescue them. Only one lost boy was a remarkably good outcome.

“…I do not understand.”

“You know as well as the rest of us, we’d normally just send out a handful of trackers to bring him home. We did this, too. We tried. You know what they found?”

“Smilodon tracks,” The Chief finished gravely.

Ah.

Eren’s gaze cut to Jean who was finally looking back at him. His usually infuriating face was sombre and grim. Eren wasn’t particularly fond of the way every eye in the room was trained on him now like they expected him to spew out some profound insight. Just because he’d been the only one to return with a tooth the last Trials. Just because he’d been the only one to return with a tooth in several  _decades_.

The trial initiates only learned after their successful enlistment that they didn’t have to bring an  _actual_  tooth. Smilodon numbers were far fewer than they had been long ago, and they rarely ventured down close enough to the village to be successfully hunted. And no one was stupid enough to  _actually_  try hunt a Smilodon single-handedly anymore. Not even seasoned Fire Warriors tried such an obviously suicidal feat for sport. You didn’t hunt a Smilodon; they hunted you, and you either got away or you died. This was common knowledge.

The goal of the final Trial had eventually morphed into who could survive the hostile mountains during a blizzard and return unscathed. Fake Smilodon tracks would be planted around the mountains for the competitors to track far enough until they were well into the wilderness, at which point it would seem like the heavy snowfall covered anything further. The final trial was one of courage, survival, and sensibility. Those that returned before a full day had past were deemed too weak-willed to be a Warrior, and anyone who got lost or stayed out hunting more than two days were branded unsuitable by disposition (you had to recognise a lost cause when you saw one).

Few boys made it as far as the final Trial, and even then, fewer still had the courage and skill to keep their mettle in the face of possibly crossing a Smilodon alone in the wilderness.

Eren  _had_  made it back, though. And he’d returned with a tooth.

“Are you sure… they weren’t the planted tracks?” Eren asked weakly.

Shadis’ face darkened.

“You think our trackers cannot tell the real thing from a stuffed toy?”

Eren ducked his head sheepishly. It had been worth a shot.

“What would you have me do?”

“Find my boy,” The Chief commanded. His fingers tightened to a white-knuckled grip around the hilt of the spear across his knees, his dark eyes trained on Eren. “His remains or whatever scrap of clothing you can salvage. He needs a proper funeral, or his restless soul will corrupt and curse us. My family needs closure. He needs to be at peace.”

Eren stiffened. My boy? The lost boy was the Chief’s  _son_? Eren knew the kid; a skinny, sickly boy named Armin. He was bright and clever. So much so he’d managed to make it through all the Trial’s through sheer ingenuity than either strength or stamina, but it was obvious he wasn’t made for this kind of thing. Eren’s heart sank at the memory of the boy.

“…And Eren?”

Eren reluctantly dragged his gaze up to meet the Chiefs black stare and swallowed nervously.

“Chief?”

The great man leaned forward menacingly. The air in the dark tent suddenly felt like the tension preceding a storm. Eren knew what was coming, but the words and the sheer venom with which they were spoken still sent a shiver of cold dread down his spine.

“I want you to kill that Smilodon,” The man said, the words quietly lethal. “I want you to rip every tooth from its skull. I want you to peel the hide from its body as it chokes on its own blood. I want you to  _avenge my son_.”

 

* * *

“Eren!”

“I don’t know what’s worse,” Eren mumbled as Jean’s hurried footfalls crunched through the snow towards him. “Facing off a Smilodon, or facing the Chief again having failed.”

Jean finally reached him, his panting breaths fogging up the hair.

“I’m coming with you.”

Eren came to a halt.

“No.” He stared in bewilderment. “No you are definitely not.”

“We’re not sending you out alone.  _I’m_  not sending you out alone!”

“You’re not coming with me, Jean,” Eren said with finality.

“You’re fucking suicidal,” Jean snarled, shoving him hard enough in the chest to send him staggering back several steps. “You’re going to get yourself  _killed_.”

“Maybe, but I’m not having you killed with me!” Eren retorted, rounding on him.

“Mikasa will—!”

“Mikasa needs  _you_ , Jean. More than ever, if I don’t come back.” Eren grabbed the other boy by the front of his coat and yanked him forward. “Take care of my family.  _That’s_  how you can help me now.”

The Jean stared at him speechless. Eren had never seen him look so lost and defeated. All their youth he’d wanted nothing more than to be responsible for putting that expression on Jean’s face; he never would have guessed it would take this.

“Will you do that for me, Jean?” Eren asked, his voice softening. “Just till I come back?”

Jean looked down, his shoulders sagging. One hand gripped the wrist of the hand Eren held his coat by and squeezed.

“…You’re going to make me tell them myself, aren’t you?”

“My sister or a Smilodon?” Eren said, laughing. “Who would you rather face?”

“The latter by far. You’re a coward and a bastard, you know that?”

“Mhm. I’ll make you eat your words when I’m back by dawn with a fine pair of Smilodon sabres and a beautiful new pelt.”

That managed to elicit a chuckle. Eren gave his friend a light shove and turned towards where the valley rose up to meet the tree line. Well, better now than later. If he thought about this too much, he’d die of worry.

“Eren!”

Eren sighed and looked back. Jean looked like a lost little boy standing alone behind him.

“Just tell me now, you idiot. Tell me how you got that damned tooth.”

Eren smiled.

“I asked nicely.”

* * *

He was alone in the black and white scenery of the woods in high winter. His heavy boots plowed ungracefully through the fresh snow. There was no need for finesse yet. Shadis had directed him to where he could find the damning Smilodon tracks that appeared ominously by Armin’s and they were way ahead where the terrain grew steep and rocky higher up the mountain side. There was nothing to be afraid of down here. Only stoats and white foxes scampering in the skeletal undergrowth foraging for food.

He hadn’t had the chance to think, yet. To  _really_  think about his quest and what it meant, knowing what he knew.

_A_   _Smilodon_.

It had been one whole year since his own encounter. Since that beautiful, pale-eyed creature started to haunt his dreams. He used to wake up and wonder if that’s all it had been, but then he’d feel under his pillow and his fingers would grip the curved white bone and any doubts would disappear.

So what? Were his mother’s stories true? Half animal, half human; a myth conjured by ancient storytellers to caution children, but with a kernel of truth? But he’d seen Smilodons from afar as well. He’d seen their gargantuan forms slinking through the blurred snow of blizzards in the distance as he peeked though the window of their hut, heart thundering in thrilled terror. Those things were predators and monsters and real.

Which brought him to his next issue, one he really didn’t want to contemplate: was he hunting that same man – if he could even be called a man? And had that man hunted  _Armin_? It didn’t make any sense; he hadn’t tried to eat Eren, and the spirits only knew Eren had been half-frozen, unarmed, and ripe for the taking had he wanted to.

…Was Eren even hunting a man or a beast?

The snow was turning soft blue around him as the shadows grew longer. The forest at twilight was a beautiful sight; the long tree trunks stripped bare of moss and warm colour looked like beams of pure black in the pale snowfall. It was so still out here, so quiet. Eren could hear his heartbeat in his ears like a steady drum. It was just him, his heavy breathing, and the occasional hoot of an owl.

Eren found the spot the trackers had followed Armin’s trail to before they’d called it a day. He was familiar enough with this entire stretch of the woods to not have any difficulty following Shadis’ directions, and it didn’t take him long to find what he’d been looking for. There had been on-and-off snow all day, so secondary snowfall had obscured the more fresh and distinctive tracks, but the light was low and thankfully favourable enough for Eren to see, when he squatted low, the shallow dips marking out where footsteps had been dusted over with snow.

He followed the weak tracks with his eyes to where they led up to rocky outcrop. He was right at the foot of the mountain. The ground here grew steep, rocky, and craggy with the incline; a good place to look for shelter, he knew. There would be plenty of nice caves to hole up in until day break, or higher ground to give a good vantage point if lost. But where were those damning Smilodon tracks that had so spooked the veteran trackers?

It was quickly getting dark, but the moonlight was a blinding stark white on the snow. It cast harsh, sharp shadows on this rough terrain and made the shadows look deeper than they should. Eren had left behind the almost comforting sounds of the woods with their scurrying foxes and watchful owls. The silence here was more disconcerting. It made his ears prick at the slightest noise.

Eren carefully made his way up the jutting rocks, ice-numb fingers stinging as they scrambled for hold. A little ways up he found what the trackers must have; dark stains on a platform of stone, smeared around like what had left them had moved or been moved. He touched his fingertip to the mess and raised them up into the light, his heart sinking. He’d seen enough blood by moonlight to recognise that particular shade of black. He looked at the stains again and tried to think like a hunter tracking injured prey rather than a lost boy. The quarry had fallen here, judging by the sheer quantity of blood. Fallen here and lay here for enough time to bleed out. His eyes tracked up the angle of the cliff that rose up from the small area of stone, and keen hunters eyes picked out patches of bloodstains splattered up the incline. He’d come down that way, battered and beaten until his prone body had come to rest on this ledge. He had not gotten back up.

Eren stood and frowned down at the dark stain frosting over the dusting of snow. Okay, but so far no foul play. The boy, of weak disposition and little experience in the wilderness, had climbed up here looking for shelter or a good vantage point, only to lose his footing and plummet down the rock face. Could happen to anyone. Eren himself knew how precarious the rocks could be after snow. It only took one misplaced foot or misjudged handhold to fall onto the sharp rocks below. He tilted his head and examined the direction of the skid marks he’d noticed earlier. They body had been moved, obviously, and it didn’t look like it had moved itself. Bleeding quarry dragging themselves left very different tracks to a body dragged. He could try follow it, but it was dark now. The moonlight was bright but misleading. It bleached the scenery of all colour and concealed any sign of tracks amidst a thousand other shadows. Eren would have to make camp soon; he would get nowhere with tracking and had found no hint of the Smilodon. He was disappointed and a little frustrated. The longer he left the trail, the colder it would go, and the Chief would be waiting.

Shrugging off his pack, Eren searched out a length of wood and rags for a torch, then settled down on an edge of stone not smeared with blood to concentrate. He cradled the torchhead between cupped hands blistered and raw from the cold, and let his mind slip away.

The art of calling fire was a tentative balance between focus and fantasy, but where Jean could track a swallow through a snowdrift, Eren had picked up Firesong like a natural. Some part of his brain stayed on the bundle of rags in his hands, but the rest of his mind wandered inwards towards the smouldering heat at his core. Ignoring the winter chill slipping beneath his furs to nip at his skin, Eren felt for the warmth and felt his stiff muscles melt as it came so readily to answer his call. He pulled his hands away just in time, the torch hilt gripped firmly between his knees just as the rags were suddenly engulfed in flames. Eren laughed giddily as the fire warmed his face and melted the frost from his lashes. He couldn’t go home yet, but in the peace of the woods with a happy fire, and he was close enough to the same. It made him think of a different kind of fire. Of warm limbs and burning eyes, and the heat that curled in his gut at the memory.

Eren sighed and opened his eyes. He looked past the light of his torch, and straight into a pair of cat-like eyes that stared right back.

He was a good ten feet away, but those eyes cut through the firelight and glowed even in darkness.

“It’s you,” Eren breathed, and his heartbeat tripped over itself in its surprise. “I – is it really you?” He raised the torch higher and slowly got to his feet, afraid a sharp movement would scare the apparition away. Pale eyes that had followed the glow of the torchlight in an almost-trance now darted back to Eren’s face.

“You did it.”

Eren froze.

“What?”

The man stepped closer – or rather prowled. His movements were as smooth and silent as water. He had both sabres again in the Smilodon skull crowning his head. Was this a new pelt? He had to have replaced to tooth he’d given Eren, but spirits, how many monsters could one man take on?

He nodded at the torch in Eren’s hand.

“You sang fire.”

“Oh.” Eren looked at the torch in his hand. “Yes. Yes! I did! I’m a Fire Warrior now!”

Eren had a thousand questions flurrying in his mind. But he forced himself to think rationally. He was here for Armin.

“Have you seen a boy here? Golden-haired and small? I am looking for him.”

He moved so fast Eren had to fight the instinct to recoil. It wasn’t a lunge or anything – he just moved  _fast_. Like his only speeds were a predatory prowl or a feline pounce. Only thing Eren knew was that the man who had stood on the fringe of his torchlight half-hidden in shadow was suddenly right in front of him. He swallowed a startled gasp.

He was… unearthly. Eren had the feeling he was asking the wrong question when wondering whether he was man or beast. His features looked carved from white stone, flawless, unmarked and pristine. Such beauty, such strange features.

“Why are you looking for him?” The man asked, and Eren felt a cold weight settled in the pit of his stomach.

“I…So you know who I am speaking about?”

“I know the boy. I have him, he is hurt.”

He hadn’t been expecting that.

“What? How? Where?!”

The man leaned back a bit, his eyes roving over Eren’s expression curiously.

“He is hurt all over. He fell down the rocks. He is not well, but resting.” Head tilted to the side, dark hair dusted with snow brushing his lashes. “You have kept me waiting a long time, Fireboy.”

Eren blinked.

“I – you – you were  _waiting_  for me?”

The man – the Smilodon? – turned away with the barest hint of a smile. And then he pounced lightly up onto the next shelf of rocks.

“Come on.”

“What?”

He didn’t repeat himself, just carried on scaling up the incline of rocks as nimble as a mountain cat, pelt trailing behind him. Eren hurried to follow, clumsily shouldering his pack and scrambling nowhere near as gracefully behind him.

 


	19. Street Brat canon-divergent drabble (11-Sep-2015)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Can you believe I had the gall to label this as canon-divergent, the canon here being _my_ fanfiction? Shameless.

“Ah, he’s singing again.” Yes, Levi could hear it. He was certain everyone in the base could. The courtyard had excellent acoustics with its tall bricked walls packed tight together, and Eren’s rich voice echoed beautifully in the small space and out to where everyone had paused their daily work to listen with enraptured attention. Levi used to bark at everyone to return to their jobs whenever this happened, but he’d gradually learned there was little point. Eren would be done with his chores in the yard eventually, and the spell of his voice would cease. It was just a matter of waiting it out. More than that, though, it had been a while since this had happened. It had been days since Eren had sung his melodies in that lilting, foreign tongue; long enough to have people start talking and the rumour mill churning. Why had their nightingale stopped singing?

Levi knew, but he could not say. Not without giving up details of what had happened and alerting everyone to Eren’s heartbreak, and more pressingly, his hand in it. Levi couldn’t help pulling a face as the word heartbreak crossed his mind. Tch, how dramatic.

He really did not want to run into Eren right now, but he had to get to the storage room to run inventory, and that meant passing the courtyard. He schooled his expression into its usual mask of indifference and kept his gaze forward, steadfastly refusing to acknowledge the crowds of girls packed behind the pillars around the small yard, peeking over each other’s heads to watch Eren work with wistful smiles on their faces. He tried to run through all the jobs he needed to do in his mind as a distraction, but the song still managed to weasel its way into his conscience. It was different to the usual ones, he noticed. It had a happy tune, but the way Eren’s tongue caressed the words and rolled around the sounds sounded sad. He didn’t have to understand the language to know it was a love song, and a sad one at that. He didn’t have to know what Eren was saying to know he meant every word.  _No, he was a performer. It was his job to sound convincing._  Levi ground his teeth together and fought the urge to look to his left, just enough to check on the boy scrubbing the cooking pots by the well.

“Captain, come listen!” Petra’s urgent whisper broke through his desperate mantra of chores, and he looked to see her beckoning insistently from behind one of the pillars. He frowned and shook his head, shooting her a stern look she promptly ignored. Scowling, she stomped over and grabbed him by the wrist, tugging him back to her spot, and he was too stunned by her audacity to resist. Which is how he found himself sandwiched between green-nosed cadet girls, peering out from behind a pillar like some pervert to watch Eren sing.

“Oh, he sounds so beautiful today. I missed his songs,” one of the girls beside him breathed dreamily. Her words were met with a chorus of hushed hums of agreement and sighs. Levi was packed tight; unless he wanted to forcefully fight out of the group, most likely causing injuries in his wake, he was stuck. There was nothing left to do, so he resigned himself to his fate, looking around at anything but Eren he waited for the boy to finish washing up. There must have been two dozen girls creatively hidden around the small area; crouched behind trees, pillars and the well itself, all for the sake of watching the boy. Levi had never realised Eren had amassed such a dedicated audience, but he supposed he’d never stuck around long enough to take it all in as he was now. He  _did_  have a beautiful voice; young, rich and strong. It carried well, dipping and winding in just the right spots, intruding into his thoughts and dragging him under like a siren’s song. Levi realised his eyes had somehow found their way to the boy, and he couldn’t look away. He was crouched on the stone floor by the well, scrubbing the burnt crust from the clay cooking pots diligently as he sang. Beads of sweat rolled down his temples and glistened on the browned skin of his bare shoulders. Shirtless again, as always. His eyes were fixed on the work at hand, but his gaze was distracted and distant, his mind a million miles away. Levi tried not to imagine what the boy might be thinking about to make his voice drip with such poignant longing. He tried not to think of his hand in it.

“Oh my God, Oh my God!”

“Who is that?”

“Is that Shreya? What’s she doing?”

He was snapped from his thoughts but the hushed exclamations of the girls around him, and he followed their indignant, fuming glares to the girl carefully picking her way through the straw mats lain out to dry and towards Eren. Levi subconsciously leaned forward, eyes narrowing. What  _was_  she doing? It was an unspoken but strictly obeyed rule that no one interrupted Eren when he sang; what was this girl  _thinking_?

“You have a beautiful voice.” Eren’s song stuttered to a halt as the boy whirled around, eyes wide with surprise. Levi could just  _feel_  the sudden, tense crackle of silent, appalled fury that descended over the courtyard the moment those words left the girl’s lips. He felt the cadets around him stiffen in shock. She’d done the unthinkable. She’d interrupted Eren’s song.

The boy himself flushed red as the words slowly processed, and he laughed shyly, scratching the back of his neck with a soap-soaked hand.

“Oh, thank you,” He avoided her gaze, eyes averted in embarrassment. The girls around Levi bristled and their anger must have been infectious because he felt a similar stirring of affront. “I didn’t realise you were here, or that anyone could hear me.”

“Oh I was just passing through and I heard you,” the girl explained hurriedly.

“Is she new here?”

“No, that’s Shreya. She sits with the Karanese girls. She knows the drill.”

“ _Unbelievable_.” The whispers around him were loud enough for him to make out, but not to give away anyone’s positions. Shreya perched herself on the lip of the well and smiled down at Eren, who cautiously returned to his work, but he didn’t start singing again.

“Can I ask what you were singing about? It sounded lovely.” Eren blushed again and blinked rapidly down at the pot in his hands. It looked clean to Levi, but Eren’s mind was elsewhere as he continued to scrub it in earnest.

“I-It’s just an old love song,” he shrugged dismissively, clearly embarrassed by the question. “I’m not very good at translating.”

“Go on, try,” Shreya encouraged anyway.

“ _’Try’_ ,” a girl beside Levi echoed mockingly. ‘Who the hell does she think she is? Doesn’t she have work she should be doing?” That was a little hypocritical, but Levi found that he empathised strongly with her tone.

Eren glanced up at the girl, tugging his lower lip between his teeth. His expression was hesitant, but he eventually relented with a breathy laugh. “Okay, I’ll try.” He took a moment to think it over, and Levi could see the way his lips moved as he mouthed the lyrics under his breath, brow pulled down in a frown as he worked the foreign words over in his mind. It was a strangely endearing sight. Then he started to sing again, this time the translated words that he could understand, his voice quieter and more tentative than before, the shyness clear in the tight wind of his shoulders and his averted eyes.

“ _Oh, what can I tell you of the state my hearts been since I met you?_

_What can I tell you of how this miracle occurred?_

_Darling, why is there such an uproar in my heart?_

_Explain it to me, sweet bird_ ”

Eren was a performer; he’d danced and sung before entire crowds before, so it clearly wasn’t the singing that was getting to him, but the song. It was intimate, personal, and not intended for outside ears; Levi’s, least of all. The realisation had Levi snapping back to reality, and carefully extracting himself from Eren’s fans around him. He had to leave, he had work to do; he had no right to watch Eren like this. This was a gross violation of his privacy and he could only imagine how the boy would feel if he knew. Levi still remembered Eren’s expression from that night fresh in his memory; he didn’t want to see that look on Eren’s face ever again.

“That sounds very personal,” Shreya said eventually. Her voice was quiet, like she’d had the sudden realisation. Eren didn’t respond and Levi didn’t look to see what expression he was wearing, turning to head back towards the storage room. Petra looked at him questioningly, but he ignored them. He didn’t want her perceptive eyes on his face, certainly not now when he couldn’t quite wrestle on his usual poker face quite effectively.

“…Are you in love, Eren?” Levi’s footsteps stilled. The question hung heavy in the air, and he could just imagine the way all the girls would be clambering over each other to catch a peek. He realised he was holding his breath, head turned slightly to the side, listening intently. Why? Why was he listening? Why did he want to hear Eren’s response? He already knew the true answer, regardless of what Eren’s would be now, but his legs just would not obey his orders to move.

Eren laughed quietly, a wry, humourless sound, and Levi could just imagine the rueful, forced smile he’d be wearing. 

“The worst kind, I’m afraid.”


	20. "Why him?" (16-Oct-2018)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A half-baked idea plus a pun
> 
> that's it, that's me in a nutshell.

# “Why him?”

Levi knew there was nothing he could say that could satisfy his mother. No one would ever be good enough for Kuchel’s children, which only made her desire to see him married off all the more baffling. He poured himself a finger of whiskey and shrugged.

“Clear eyes, straight teeth, good knees.”

Kuchel’s lips pursed with terminal disapproval, but she did not look up from her daybook. She struck off an entry with such a severe flourish that Levi was surprised the paper didn’t tear. The fire crackled, the ice in his glass rattled, and Kenny took a long, silent drag of his cigar. Kuchel’s disdain was palpable enough to choke on.

“What are you, buying a horse?” She finally said, cold and unamused.

Kenny chuckled derisively and spoke for the first time, naturally to say something incredibly unhelpful in true Kenny fashion.

“The man needs to ride something, Kuchel.”


End file.
